This Just Isn't My Day
by Ice-Eagle Y'siri
Summary: Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the heck out of the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.
1. Dropping In

**Title:** This Just Isn't My Day

**By:** Ice-Eagle Y'Siri

**Disclaimer:** Don't own Naruto or the Akatuski or anything associated with Naruto.

**Summary:** Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the heck out of the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

**Soooooooooo...I've started redoing the chapters. I started writing TJIMD about three years ago and if you look at my latest chapter compared to the earlier ones, you can definitely see the difference in chapter quality. Therefore, I'm going back and fixing the earlier chapters for the readers who probably were intersted in my story, but skipped over it because the writing wasn't well done.**

**Let me know what you all think. Thanks for reading and don't forget to review!**

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_**Aya's POV**_

Normally, I'm a very calm person. I got straight A's my final year in high school (and Honors before that, but it's not particularly relevant) and I get along with mostly everyone. I have two really close friends: Catherine and Rian (said REE-yahn), and the latter and I were staying at Catherine's house for the summer. Her parents are extremely wealthy, so all our parents agreed to give us "a-real-life-living-on-your-own-experience".

With a little more luxury than the average university student, of course. I mean, we _were _gonna be college freshmen in the fall. Cat was going to be studying Vocal Performance while Rian went into something about x-rays or whatever while I started my Bachelor's degree in Exercise Physiology/Anatomy/something(I wanted to do Occupational Therapy or pre-med).

All three of us are-slightly dysfunctional. From knee-high bubbles to the neighbors being reduced to buying Rottweilers next door, our pranking expertise was both varied and slightly strange.

But anyway. I just came back back from running errands, my arms full of bags, and imagine, just _imagine,_ seeing the entire Akatsuki in my living room, with Catherine and Rian tied up in the center. Well. Isn't _this_ a pretty picture. I'm so gonna die. Which will suck.

Keep cool, Aya. Just keep calm.

Keh. Yeah, right.

I take a deep breath. "So, are these people delusional cosplayers or the real thing?" I began to walk into the kitchen, which was adjacent to the front door, but Itachi appeared & held me still. I'm tired and I wanna put my stuff down and my arms are tired and sore and _he's not helping_, dammit.

"Duuuuuuuude," I whined "It's food, okay? Can't I put them down? Unless YOU want to have eggs in your eyes…" That didn't exactly help much. He grabbed them out of my hands, set them down, and marched me into the living room on the couch, kunai to my neck. _'I am so, so dead'._

Leader inclined his head toward me, "Will you answer our questions truthfully?"

I cocked my head to the side, "I suppose. But you can't kill-" a kunai was pressed to my neck and Itachi murmured in my ear "-Whyever not? We don't really need you. We could kill you and no one would be the wiser."

Holy heck. Anyone who says Itachi isn't scary is insane. Bonkers. Spinny motion with your finger. Cookoo for Cocoa Puffs.

So screwed. So, so screwed.

"On the contra-ouch, can you move that back a bit-thanks- on the contrary, you _do_ need us. You obviously aren't in your world any longer, and you don't know what it's like here, and if you didn't know where to go, you could be shot on sight. These bullets," I said dryly "you wouldn't be abe to dodge. We'd cook and stuff for y'all, too, like good hostesses."

"But not servants? I see. Girl, you have spunk. It'd be best if your friends had the same." He turned to consult the rest of the Akatsuki. Sticking my tongue out at his back, I rushed over to Catherine and Rian.

"You alright?"

"Yeah. The dudes just came out of flippin' _nowhere_. The room was empty and Catherine and I were watching _V for Vendettta_ while waiting for you, and then, 'ka-poof!' all the Akatsuki are here and had us tied up in 3 seconds flat. Man," she said wistfully "I'd _give_ to be a shinobi."

"Technically kunoichi," Catherine jumped in "So do you think they'll agree?"

I shrugged, "I dunno. God, this proves I can't leave you two by yourselves. Letting in all these strangers! You two should be ashamed of yourselves."

"Dude," Rian sounded irritated "You're not my mother. Or my father. You sound like my grandparents, and they're OLD."

I mock-glared at Rian and Catherine started snickering. Often, I acted as the group's collective conscience and, so far, anyway, been able to keep us mostly out of trouble. With us all going to college in a few months, I knew that was going to change. I glanced to the Akatsuki group. Seeing them still conferring, I rolled my eyes.

"Oh, shut it. You know you need a conscience. At least I've kept us out of serious trouble. This'll be our last summer for mischief, you guys. College!" I high-fived Rian.

"_Hell_, yes, man! I'm so excited!" Catherine facepalmed and I sighed. Rian could be really blunt; sometimes, though it's usually me, too loud for her own good.

"Did you have to say that so loud?"

"What?"

"What're we gonna do with the cost of having them here? I mean, food and clothes and-"

"-Clothes?"

"Well, duh, were you expecting them to go anywhere in _those_ getups? How'll they blend in?"

"Genjutsu?" I added in hopefully. Catherine just huffed.

"I doubt it would work on contact. So they'll need clothes. And mom 'n dad'll need a reason for the spending limit to go up...great."

I snorted. Great? I'll be the one shopping for all the food. Presumably one of the Akatsuki will need to go with me. Wonderful.

"We've made our decision."

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**I hope this sounds better than the first version. It still needs some touching up, but I hope it's acceptable for now. :)**

**Oh, yeah. This is kinda-sorta a spin-off of **_**When Are We Going To Die? **_**and **_**How Are We Still Alive? **_**by Nairo Xana and Jemmi. Their work has inspired this story. However, I'm not intending as going in the same direction that they did...mine will turn out to be quite different. So I recommend reading theirs first; they have one of theirs done and are working on the second one currently. They're both excellent so I give full credit to them for the idea that I have written so far.**


	2. Sporks and Pluots

**Title:** This Just Isn't My Day

**By:** Ice-Eagle Y'siri

**Dislaimer:** I don't own Naruto or any other associated characters except my own, which currently are Aya, Rian, and Catherine.

**Summary: **Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the heck out of the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

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_**Aya's POV**_

"We've made our decision". The three of us exchanged looks from our position on the floor.

We were either going to die, or we were going to be their hostesses for however long until they were able to go home. Neither was very appealing. Sure, we liked the Akatsuki, but they were mass murderers to the X-treme (with a capital X), so being their hostesses would be…interesting. So I guess being alive was better than nothing.

And to think, I thought I would have a sort-of normal vacation filled with pranks to pull on the preppy neighbors. Except I'm guessing they might be on to us. Considering Rian left her initials on the last surprise we left them, it's no wonder they amped up their security, though I do believe the rottweilers patrolling the perimeter is a bit much. I mean, we're not _that_ bad. Most of the time.

Back to the conversation:

"You mean you've made the damn decision, _Leader._" The amount of sarcasm imbued in just that word made me raise an eyebrow at the speaker on one of the armchairs. He had whitish-silver hair and didn't wear a shirt underneath his partially undone Akatsuki cloak. He is _built, _wow. Not like adolescent hotness built (I've had enough of that from football), but like older man hotness built. Jeeeeez. He also had on a silver rosary around his neck, and he scowled.

"The hell you looking at, bitch?" I gestured "The rosary".

Catherine leaned over and whispered, "Somehow, I don't think he's a Catholic".

"Neither can I." He has such a dirty mouth. Didn't his mother have better manners? But then again, he's clearly psychotic. No doubt he forgot everything from his childhood, if he even had one.

"-and Jashin is my God and-" Oh, whoops. Was he still talking?

"Jeez, Hidan, can't you shut up?" Deidara, exactly how he looked in the show, flopped on to the couch I was on previously, catching a kunai and throwing it back. Man, they better not destroy the house, or there'll be hell to pay for it.

"Dammit, Tobi, watch whe-"

"Silence." At Leader's tone, Deidara settled with a grumble and the rest took the oppurtunity to relax against walls or lean against the furniture. All of them, I noticed, kept a wary half eye on us as he spoke. They needn't have worried, though. We couldn't have done anything without us being seen, regardless.

"As I have said, we reached a decision. We agree to this arrangment, and since we will be staying here, we won't demolish the house. We also agree that we won't kill you. I can't promise that you may not come to inury, but we will try to not cause life-threatening damageto you three. Agreed?"

The three of us stood up cautiously, "Agreed."

Rian, the most flexible and accepting of us, just sighed after surveying them all. "Well, I guess we should figure out where you're sleeping. Catherine? What's up with the house?" She scratched her head.

"Well, it's a 8 bedroom house, but since the three of us have our own rooms and since there's not way in HELL we're sleeping with y'all as roommates-"

"Like we'd want to," Hidan muttered darkly. I smirked and Catherine continued like she hadn't heard the dig "-you guys'll have to pair up somehow. I'll take you upstairs. Rian, you coming?"

"Yeah," I sighed. Great. They're leaving me by myself to get groceries? Wonderful.

"Since we've magically added nine more guests, I'll go back to the store and get more food." I grabbed my keys after putting the cold items away to see Tobi, much to my surprise, detach himself from the group and intercept me at the door. Out of the Akatsuki, I found Tobi the most tolerable, maybe Konan (from what I knew of her) and Itachi (since he rarely spoke at all) second and third.

"Tobi wants to come. Tobi will be a good boy. Can Tobi come?" I grinned at his childishness and slipped out the door, him right behind me.

"Tobi, you can't wear a mask. Or the cloak." He wagged a finger at me as I got in my Jeep and cast a genjutsu on himself. Now, he wore a hoodie like me (but red, not grey) and the same black pants with a turtleneck underneath to help cover his face.

Jeez. Secrecy much? He's nearly as bad as Kakashi-

"Excuse me?" Uh, oh. Did I say that out loud? I covered my mouth as I backed out the driveway. Oh, crap.

"Nothing, nothing. Just trying to remember what to get from the store. Hop along behind me, okay?"

"Tobi be a good boy. Tobi follow and not get lost!" I started laughing as I drove down the street. He's so weird. I'm going to have an interesting time with him at the store. A little while later I pulled into the Giant Eagle parking lot and grabbed a cart out of a nearby shopping cart drop-off.

Tobi was waiting for me by the floral section, sniffing at some flowers. He cocked his head at me as I came up "Tobi is confused. Why do the flowers not smell?"

I cautiously tapped the leaves of the red Rose plant, then grinned, "Don't they have fake flowers in your world, Tobi? They're for decoration so people don't have to worry about taking care of them. That's why it doesn't smell".

"But they're not as pretty as the real thing, are they, Aya-chan?" I turned towards him with a frown as we began to walk down the aisles, "Where'd you hear my name, Tobi?"

"The other two talk a lot, Aya-chan. While we waited for you to come home, they talked about you and hoped you were okay, " he paused as I grabbed a couple gallons of milk, "Kakuzu's lactose intolerant. If you get that, you can't let it get in Kakuzu's food."

I just shrugged and walked onward down the aisles and Tobi moved to catch up with me, "I'll be careful. I'm not so stupid as to try to poison him. Give me some credit, Tobi." As we meandered through the fruit section, I curiously picked up a pluot** (1)** and turned it around and around. Giving it to Tobi, I wandered farther down to see "grape-tasting apples" **(2)** and, picking one package up, put it into the cart with the other foodstuffs.

"Can we get some of these pluots?"

I frowned at him. I didn't even know what they were-and gasped in horror at Tobi's hoodie.

"TOBI! Did you eat one? You didn't eat one in the store, did you? You did. Jesus Christ." I whacked him with a spork (always kept one incase Catherine or Rian and I had a fight and I got kicked out of the house. They make great lockpicks. If those fail, I use a screwdriver), which, of course, just slid off his hoodie. I groaned.

"Tobi didn't eat any of them! Honest! Tobi is a good boy," he drew me aside as I reluctantly let him fill a bag full of pluquots "Leader needs Tobi to ask you something. Leader wants to know how you three know about us." I facepalmed as we moved farther back through the store towards the meat section. I totally forgot that they didn't know that they didn't exist here! Idiot idiot idiot! Catherine is going to_ spork my eyes out _and_ beat me with a rusty spoon. I am going to DIE._ Tobi interrupted my train of thought with a-

"-We heard Catherine talking about us...and Tobi is confused about why Rian wanted to shut her up...we threatened them after that."

...never mind. I will spork _Catherine's_ eyes out instead. And then beat her with a stick _and_ a rusty spoon. She is going to GET IT when I get home.

...unless the other members of the Akatsuki get her first. Then I'll bring her back and _then_ beat her with a stick.

Tobi was waving his hand in front of my face, and I didn't realize that I had stopped. Blinking and shaking my head, I resumed looking for the different meats and cuts, and ended up grabbing several steaks and left orders of specially sliced beef for me to pick up. I was the designated chef, while Catherine did our laundry (a few carefully planned mishaps with doubly concentrated clothes detergent rid me of the job) and Rian the dishes and vaccuuming. We all took turns taking out the trash.

"Ummmmmmm...," I stalled "It's kinda complicated. You guys...don't exist here. You live in a different dimension."

"I gathered that," said Tobi dryly "Tobi isn't an utter moron. Tobi smart." I chuckled nervously and continued onward, "Ninja don't exist here, but there's a show and manga made by Masasashi Kishimoto , and according to him, anyway, "I rolled my eyes "You're made up. Currently, you are in the United States of America, in the state of Florida, located nearby Gainesville, which is south-east of the capital city, Tallahassee".

His silence started to make me nervous, so I blurted out a question, "So how did you get here? I can't imagine that you just poofed away. Did a jutsu go wrong or something?" We moved further along towards the store, in the canned food aisle, before he spoke.

"I don't really know. Tobi is confused. Tobi remembers us all together for something, and then something went wrong and there was a big BOOM." After I moved to the front of the store and checked out, I asked "Was a lot of chakra released?"

"Yeeees...but there was no one around. We made sure of that," He helped me unload the cart's contents into the back of my silver Nisssan Desert Runner, then got into the front with me, "Why does curious Aya ask? Akatsuki needs to figure out how to get back". Without asking, he got in the passenger seat of the car and I helped him buckle himself in.

"I suppose I just want to hear more about where you guys lived and how things happen from your point of view. Your take on things must've been interesting." That was an understatement "But enough about that. How do you think the others'll react when they hear what I just told you?"

All the answer that I got was a lift of the shoulders in reply. Tobi seemed to be as unsure as me, which is odd in and of itself. Unless..."Tobi not know. Tobi new. But I was wondering...when was this photo taken?" I turned my head as the car moved forward to see the picture that I kept in the passenger's compartment. I grinned.

"That photo was taken in the aftermath of cotton candy fight at the school during a festival," I was on the left, Catherine in the middle, and Sarah on the right. I had brown curly hair and eyes, Rian dark-blonde and Catherine reddish-brown hair. Rian had green eyes and so did Catherine. I was a half-inch shorter than Rian, and Catherine was a few inches shorter than me, "-it took forever for us to get the smell out, after. I don't think my hair had ever been so clean!"

We laughed as I pulled in the driveway. We both got out and began to get groceries out of the trunk. Somehow, I had a feeling that it would be okay...for the time being.

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**AN: (1)- A pluot is a cross between a kumquot and a plum. They're good but pretty sweet (I'm a very picky eater)**

**(2)-Grape-tasting apples (also called Grapples) do exist, though I haven't seen them very often. I don't like grapes, but they're interesting to try once. Call them a novelty.**

**Thanks to Snowshadows for her encouragement and my best friends (they share an account) ShikaSennyo for reviewing and giving positive feedback!**

**The next chapter will start right where this one ends...I should have it up in a week or so. Review (constructive criticism) and no flames! Thanks!**


	3. Broken Doors and Revelations

**Title:** This Just Isn't My Day: Chapter 3

**Author:** Ice-Eagle Y'siri

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Naruto, the Akatsuki, or any other associated characters. So far, I own Aya, Rian, and Catherine.

**Summary:** Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

**I'm so sorry I haven't updated! I've been really busy with a lot of stuff lately, so I haven't had time to put up this chapter. Thanks for waiting, and thanks especially to the people who reviewed! Constructive criticism, as emphasized, is best, please! Read on!**

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_We laughed as I pulled in the driveway. We both got out and began to get groceries out of the trunk. Somehow, I had a feeling that it would be okay...for the time being._

_"The time being"_ turning out to be much, much shorter than I thought. Actually, about 10 seconds after Tobi and I locked the car and began to walk up the driveway, we heard my two just _wonderful_ friends come screaming out the front door. Hear the sarcasm? Yeah. Thought so.

They skidded to a stop in front of the two of us and I said dryly, " I suppose you aren't helping get stuff out of the car?"

"RUN! RUN! WE TOLD THEM, AYA! RUU-Ouch!" Catherine glared as she rubbed her head, "What was that for?"

I sighed "One, you don't need to yell when you're right in front of us. Two, Tobi already told me. Three, be glad I'm just hitting you on the head. I _was_ going to beat you to death with a spork and a stick, but I changed my mind when I thought of the Akatsuki dealing with you. Four-"

"Isn't she done ye-ouch!" I continued , "Four, can't I leave you two by yourselves for at least a half-our without getting yourselves into trouble? This is ridiculous. Do you guys have a death wish or something?"

Rolling my eyes at Tobi, who I could've _sworn_ started snickering, the two of us started walking up to the house. Wow. Trust my friends to set it up as a death trap.

"Tell us when we can come back inside. It would suck sleeping out here!" Catherine hollered from behind a rock. Right before I shut the door, I yelled back, "I've done it before! Don't complain!"

Piffle. Amateurs. It's not _that_ bad. Well, aside from all the freakish hills on the ground where the fire ants are. And knowing the two of them, it's either that or the rock. I'm betting on the rock for tonight. Heaven knows I've slept out there often enough on my own-

**_you were stargazing. That doesn't count.You had bug repellent. And a sleeping bag-_**

Oh, shut up, conscience. I smirked to myself as I entered the kitchen and began putting the ice cream and other fridge items away, "For some odd reason, Tobi, I don't think Leader wanted the rest of them to know first. Just a guess."

"Your brilliant deduction astounds me." I didn't look up from inside the fridge, "It's rude to eavesdrop, Itachi. And thank you. Would you please hand me the butter and cheese?" I stuck my hand over the door and he obligingly handed them to me "Thanks. Itachi, do I say Ih-tachi or Eee-tachi?"

Finishing with the cold food, I moved on to the pantry, which was opposite the fridge and by the microwave. I looked back to see him leaning against the doorway to the family room, eyes flickering between black and Sharingan. I inwardly rolled my eyes. Jeez. If he's trying to freak me out, it's not working. Good Lord. Even _Tobi_ is scarier than him, and that's saying something, because it's Tobi. I mean, the dude would probably glomp the Easter Bunny, for crying out loud.

Well, if he knew who he was, anyway.

I raised an eyebrow, "Well?"

"...Either is fine". I saw Kisame standing behind him and asked curiously "Is he like this _all_ the time?"

The blue-skinned man looked like he was trying not to smile and covered his mouth "Yes, he is, Aya-san."

My lips twitched and I turned back around to the pantry. I think I'll reorganize all the canned foods by alphabetical order and expiration date. Well, at least until I get myself back under control. Let's see, Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup (_possibilities!, Oh, SHUT UP_) goes up here-

"By the way, Aya-san. You friends have told us that we don't...exist here. Is this true?" I poked my head out from behind the pantry door to see if I could find Tobi

"Oh, TOOOOOOOOOOOOBEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" (A.N: I know that's not how you spell his name, but it looks better than using I's) I tilted my head back to see the aforementioned shinobi standing in front of the pantry door, "Yes, Aya-chan?"

"You feel like telling them?" He gave me an (what I could perceive behind his orange mask, anyway) 'are-you-FAHREAKING-kidding-me?' look and I sighed "You're most likely to survive a homicidal rage if the rest of the Akatsuki shows up. I'll hopefully die quickly."

"Now, why would we do something like that?" Kakuzu poked his head through the door and I winced. Not "through the doorway" door. As in, through the front _door_. I winced as Rian's voice rang out.

"DUDE! YOU JUST BASHED YOUR HEAD THROUGH THE DAMN DOOR!! WHAT THE HELL, MAN!! THAT THING'S FREAKING EXPENSIVE!!"

"You would know, as an eavesdropper," Kakuzu calmly opened the door, then pulled his head out of the hole and dropped the two guilty members on the ground, "You were saying, Kisame-san?"

I fought to keep my face under control, "Rian, Catherine, why were you two eavesdropping? It takes ninjas to eavesdrop on other ninjas. I thought you knew this."

"Well," Rian groused, " I thought that-ouch, Catherine, dammit, that _hurt_-excuse me, _we_ thought that they would be preoccupied with you being questioned about their, uh, existence, but just as we reached the door Ka-BAMETH! Kakuzu was like, there and admonished us about eavesdropping and then stuck his head through our **front door**-" She glowered at said ninja and he rolled his eyes,"-so now besides getting you all new clothes we have to get a new door. Or have one of you people fix it, 'cuz we sure as heck can't."

"Wait, new clothes? There's no WAY in hell I'm fixing any damn doors." Hidan joined us in our little gathering in the kitchen, so now it was Hidan, me, Rian, Catherine, Tobi, Itachi, Kisame, and Kakuzu all together. It was easier for me, though, as I was in the pantry and not out with everyone else, so it wasn't totally crowded...ish, anyway.

"Clothes?" Rian snorted from her spot on the ground, "Don't tell me you were actually going to go around in _those _outfits. And it's hot down here in the Sunshine State. Y'all will die in a week from the heat. Speaking figuratively, of course." She added hurriedly.

"She's right. Genjutsu can't do everything," Pein's voice rang out from the family room "So we'll need to go to wherever people here shop. Catherine-san, have you thought of an excuse?"

She shrugged as best she could sitting down, "Thought I'd tell my 'rents that we're renovating the house some; the door now gives us the excuse. And the fact that we need clothes for school, since where we go it has a somewhat strict dress code."

"But how will you explain the broken door?" Catherine smirked at me, "I'll tell them that you flung the display bowling ball again."

I sighed, "That was only _once_..." Rian grinned

"But you nailed _me,_ in case you forgot, dummy. Now if it was Catherine, on the other hand-"

"HEY!"

"While I appreciate your tactics in distracting us, Aya-san, I would like to know. Do shinobi exist here?" I winced as every eye turned towards me.

"Uhhhhhh...what would you do if I said no? Because you don't." Oh god oh god oh God I'm gonna die ohmigod-

"I'm not going to kill you, Aya-san **(2)**. I am merely...surprised, to a degree. As I hope you would understand." I was dumbfounded. One of the Seven Swordsmen wasn't going to kill me? Holy shiznit. Well, that's two Akatsuki members I don't have to worry about...

"No, you don't. And it's a sorta-kinda-not really long story. Basically, a dude in Japan named Masasashi Kishimoto created you guys in something called a manga/anime. Your'e also a TV show and quite popular. Or well, Naruto is. You're the bad guys. But whatever. You get it?"

The shark man nodded and I breathed a small sigh of relief. Now, what about the others...

Hidan looked sorta surprised, Itachi expressionless as usal, and I couldn't tell with Tobi 'cuz of his mask, but he already knew. Kakuzu looked slightly shocked, and I really don't know how the others will react. I ventured a question.

"So you aren't...furious? Totally angry?" Hidan shrugged, "Why would we give a damn about some dude in some damn country somewhere not here? I've killed and tortured for my god, and that's all I care about. He can go jump off a fuckin' cliff, for all I care."

The others murmured their agreement and I slowly began to relax. Now as to us going shopping...

...God, Akatsuki in a mall is scary to think about...actually, _any_ kind of shinobi in a mall is scary to think about. At least it's not Christmas season. I'd hate to know what they'd do to the Santa Claus that the mall hires every year. Hidan would probably skewer him. I smirked. Since we're inevitably going to split up, I'm definitely going to take Tobi and Itachi and whoever else with me. I'll leave the rest to drive Catherine and Rian nuts. Well, at least it's not Wally World **(1)**, God forbid.

I shudder in terror.

"Then it's decided," Pein's voice floated through the doorway, "We leave tomorrow for the mall. Any questions?"

"Hey, _Leader,_" I rolled my eyes 'here we go again', "Are we splitting up tomorrow 'cuz there's no _fuckin_' way I'm going with the two morons over the-"

"HEY!!" Both my friends nearly got up but Kakuzu's hands on their shoulders stilled them. I rolled my eyes behind Hidan's back and they both snickered.

"That will be decided tomorrow. We leave when they get up." Yes, _dad_. Gyawd.

"Which means sometime in the morning, Aya." I huffed, "Fine, fine. Whatever. Good _night_." Thankfully, they all dispersed fairly quietly (we could hear Hidan cursing to Jashin when we left) and we all hit our pillows and knew no more.

Heaven knew what would happen when we arrived at the mall. I can only pray that Deidara doesn't set off any explosives while we're there...

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**Again, I'm really incredibly sorry that I haven't updated until now, but I've been really busy. I have some ideas for the next chapter, so it should be up soon! If and/or when you review, constructive criticism is best! I _will _ignore flames, so you have been warned.**

**(1) For people who don't know, Wally-World is another name for Wal-Mart. I know some people like Wal-Mart, but I don't, so don't be surprised to see some occasional bashing of this store.**

**(2) Kisame, though some people don't portray him as such, is actually incredibly calm and polite to other people and addresses them correctly. Which makes sense, considering Itachi probably would've killed him if he were otherwise.**

**Until next time, folks! Oh, and thanks for reviews from Shikasennyo, SnowsShadows, Friglit, thiefkingbakura4eva, Sasoriforever, VampireArgonian92, and Kidloco. Keep them coming, please! :D**


	4. Paper Towel Rolls and Cannibalism

**Title:** This Just Isn't My Day: Chapter 4

**Author:** Ice-Eagle Y'siri

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Naruto, the Akatsuki, or any other associated characters. So far, I own Aya, Rian, and Catherine.

**Summary:** Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

**Before we begin, I'm so sorry I haven't updated! Life gets busy nowadays and I just haven't had the time to do stuff. Yes, I know it's short, but the next chappie will be longer, I promise! Thanks for the reviews and read on!**

* * *

"Deidara, I thought you weren't going to bring any explosives!"

"Pffffft. Can't you tell when shinobi lie, un? And Tobi, gerroff me-"

"Tobi sorry! Tobi scared of Kakuzu-senpai! Wah!"

"This is what happens when-"

"I don't give a _damn_ about it, Hidan. NONE of y'all are riding on the roof. NONE."

"You have a godawful accent, Rian." A snort could be heard from the captain's seat,

"So says the Northerner."

"Not so much anymore, thank you." I looked in the rearview mirror to see if Konan/Pein were successful with their earplugs. I smirked when I saw both of them knocked out in the back seat.

Yep, they were.

_"Aya? Are they still fighting?"_

"Um. Yes? How are your lovely passengers doing?"

_"Did she just call me lovely? What the-"_

_"**No, she was talking to me, idiot."**_

_"Was not-"_

I sighed "Zetsu, do you have to argue with yourself over the radio?"

_"We're bored. Of course."_

"You haven't eaten anyone, have you?"

"Itachi would've fireballed him if he did, genius. Kisame would've gone all rabid-shark on his butt." I grinned, "You would know, wouldn't you, Hidan?"

"WHOA WHOA WHOA. WAY TOO MUCH INFORMATION, AYA."

_"No, we haven't ye-say what? Hidan's gay? Since when?"  
"**Oooohhhhhh...**"_

"NOT EVER, GODA-"

:AN: Please excuse the interruption, but the next two pages of dialogue have been removed due to especially graphic language:

I stared at Hidan through the rearview, dumbfounded.

"Aya?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you taking notes?"

"Hon, I'm driving. Of course not."

_"...homophobe."_ The exaggerated rolling of Kisame's eyes was easily pictured, _"You just now figured this out?"_

"Wow, un. I knew Hidan was a potty-mouth, but -"

"Don't _even,_ Deidara."

A whack was heard. _"What was that?"_

"Wasn't me. _I'm_ the driver. _I_ have an excuse." I ducked a piece of cardboard. Thank God that we're at a stoplight, is all I've got to say.

"Was is it with you and cardboard, Rian?"

"I like it. Besides-" Another _whack_ is heard "-it's satisfying to hear beat against an empty skull. Paper towel rolls are fabulous for this kind of thing."

"It is such a good thing Tobi likes you all, un. I would've lit this whole damn thing we're riding on on fire."

_"Except you'd kill everyone else, Deidara."_

"Itachi-un, do you have to ruin my fun?"

_"Since I'm the only who can without dying, yes."_

"Oh, and Zetsu, what did you mean by yet?"

_"Well, Aya-san-"_

**_"burp"_**

I bang my head against the steering wheel. Multiple times. HARD.

_"Zetsu-san?"_

_"Wh-"_

**_"-at?"_**

_"You're an idiot."_

"So wait, who'd you eat?"

_"The shark-"_

**_"idiot."_**

_"Aya, dear, he's kidding."_

I sighed in relief as I continued to drive.

"Well, damn. Everyone would've been a lot happier without him around-"

_"Hidan-san, don't make me fight you when we arrive. It shall be most painful. I would relish tearing off your legs."_

"...dammit."

I smirked at Hidan through the rearview mirror. Rian, Tobi, and Deidara started laughing. I pulled into the parking lot.

"Well, ladies and gentlemen, we're here. Everyone out. And Deidara?"

"What, un?"

"Don't bring _too_ much of your clay. I'll tell Konan if you do."

"Sneak."

"The best."


	5. Shopping Tickles

**Title:** This Just Isn't My Day: Chapter 5

**Author:** Ice-Eagle Y'siri

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Naruto, the Akatsuki, or any other associated characters. So far, I own Aya, Rian, and Catherine.

**Summary:** Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

**I'M SO SO SO FREAKING SORRY I HAVEN'T UPDATED!!! **

**But we all know how life can get in the way sometimes, and it definitely did so in this case. **

**Onto other things...I feel so special...people actually REVIEWING what I'm writing! Wheeeeeeeeeee**

**I'm SO happy! Can't you tell?**

**So this is another chapter...tell me what y'all readerly-people think. And feel free to PM me ideas or include them in your reviews. As usual, no flames (you can but I won't respond. Or I might cackle in unholy glee. But whatever) and enjoy!**

* * *

Shrugging into my thin, hood-less black jacket (I had worn cargo pants, a black tanktop with a lion on it, and black flip-flops) with my wallet in my pocket, I got out of the car after the others exited (more like Hidan nearly hit me in the face with the side door) we all embarked through the parking lot to Catherine's car. Rian was on my left side, Tobi on my right, and the rest (Hidan, Deidara, Pein, and Konan) ranged out behind us. Rian wore flip flops, dark blue jeans, and a dark green t-shirt that said in white _"Thousands of plants are killed by vegetarians every day. Help end the violence."_

I rolled my eyes at my best friend, "You know, Zetsu's gonna love you now."

"What?"

I pointed at her shirt. "He's a plant. Well, sorta, anyway."

She looked horrified. Hee, hee. I'm so good. Catherine's going to fall down laughing when she figures it out.

"Duh-un!" Our conversation was temporarily halted as we all stared at Deidara.

"_What _was_ that?_" Deidara shrugged, "Well, un. It's like, duh-un."

"Were you saying that for emphasis or was that just how you spoke?"

He blinked at me. "Emphasis."

"Jashin kill us all. He's such a damn blonde." My rolled back to Hidan, "You're one to talk, Hidan. The bleached-blondeness? Yeah. It's called PLATINUM."

Rian snickered. We finally reached Catherine and the others and trooped into the mall.

"Well, Catherine, clothes first? Or shoes?" She mock-punched me.

"Clothes. Rian'll take too long with shoes." The aforementioned girl looked dumbfounded.

"Say what?" My eyes rolled so far back I nearly fell down.

"Come on, girl. We all know about your shoe-fetish. You see, Catherine had to clean the house-"

"-yeah, my OCD spring cleaning-"

"-and she opened the door-"

"-not expecting much-no offense, girl, but you're practical when it comes to clothes. Or supposedly-"

-and what do you know, an avalanche of shoes fell down on top of her-"

"-so I was kinda stuck-"

"-and I spent at least an hour getting her out-"

"-so now we know." We finished together. Rian just looked back and forth from Catherine to me.

"That was...creepy. So I have a shoe-fetish. Let's not even talk about you guys, okay? Wait-where are the others?" We looked back to see the Akatsuki at the entrance to the mall. We started walking back and began to laugh at their expressions. They looked around the place, open-mouthed, taking in the glory that is the Gainesville Mall. Or, as known by everyone else, The Oaks.

Which, I do have to admit, is pretty dang nice. The only thing they don't have is a Kohl's, but hey. Not every mall is perfect.

"Sooooooooo...," I looked around at everyone, "Where do people want to go first? And we're going in 2 or 3 main groups."

Pein and Konan pointed to the Hot Topic, and I rolled my eyes. I should've known, them being depressed/angsty ninjas and all, "Catherine, you up for it?"

My best friend waved a hand, "Sure, sure. Anyone else wanna go with me? Mind, we won't spend the entire time there, but-" She was still talking as Kisame, Pein, and Konan detached themselves from the group. Which left myself, Rian, Hidan, Tobi, Zetsu, Deidara, Itachi, and Sasori. 'How convenient' I thought dryly 'we can each take three.'

"Who wants to go with me?" Rian looked slightly nervous and I grinned in glee, "Rian, do you want me to take the troublemakers?"

The aforementioned girl looked skeptical.

"Aren't they _all_ troublemakers?" I tried to cover my laugh and failed. Miserably.

"You do have a point. Well, who would you _rather_ have shop with you?" All the shinobi rolled their eyes and Hidan could be seen mumbling under his breath. I tilted my head a little to the side and cupped my ear pointedly.

"Excuse me?"

"Nothing, dammit." I beamed.

"Well, you're going with me, then. And I"ll take...Tobi and Deidara. Sound good?" Rian looked relieved.

"Yeah, that's fine, that's fine. Thanks. I don't like them much, anyway. Alright, plant-eater, puppet-boy, and depressed Uchiha, y'all coming? And Aya, I'll call when we're done...or something."

We watched them walk away, Rian bopping Sasori's head and laughing. She's braver than me, that's for sure. I snorted and we turned to move in the other direction, towards the _Belk_. I I looked up at the sign that was a lot bigger than me, and wondered.

"Tobi is new here, Aya, but Tobi thinks that that is a very strange name for a store," Tobi bounced around, looking at all of the stores and their respective mannequins. I smiled at him.

"Yes, Tobi, I'll admit that it's a very odd name for a store. I don't know why they've come up with it, but well, they seem do well in their business."

"So why're we here, un?" I just stared in blank amazement.

"Have you _totally_ missed what we were talking about for the past DAY, Deidara? Good Lord. And I thought _Hidan_ was special, " I shook my head as we walked inside, then headed back towards the men's section.

"What did you just say, bitch?"

"Nothing, nothing. Come on, let's get started." I browsed among the racks and racks of pants and shirts, and began throwing things at them to hold on to. I trusted in their shinobi reflexes to not drop them, and they thankfully didn't. Contrary to popular belief at my school, I was a very good (if I did say so myself) shopper, and was had a fairly good idea of what one should and shouldn't wear.

The hardest out of the three was Hidan, of course, because of his hair and total immodesty. Tobi was a close second because of his beloved orange mask, then Deidara was a walk in the park. Even if, you know, he _did_ look like a transvestite, or something pretty close. But that was Deidara for you. If it wasn't for the _hair_...

I steered them towards the dressing rooms and waited patiently outside. I had instructed them to try on one set of clothes at a time, so I could inspect them and do the whole "turn-around-and-see-if-the-clothes-bunch" thing. This should be interesting...oh, yes. I'm sure my face is glowing with unholy glee.

And then I realized.

I could see if they were ticklish. Yes. YES.

"Aya-chan? Are you out there?" I snapped out of my mild doze and peeked around the corner to see what Tobi had decided to put on. My mouth nearly--nearly, mind--dropped.

But in a good way. For guys, I believed in the casual look, so I was pleased with how this had turned out for the orange-masked ninja.**[1]**

His head was normal, and then the rest...well. He had khaki-colored cargo pants on (I didn't dare try to go outside of utility colors, which go with everything **[2]**), with his ninja sandals (he wouldn't part with them) and a simple black long-sleeved shirt that clung slightly to his body. Another t-shirt (in dark grey) went on top with a silvery skull on the back. He was standing with one of his hands in his pockets, and the other rubbing his head sheepishly.

"Tobi."

"Aya-chan?"

"You look _freaking awesome._ I am the _best shopper EVER._ By the way, you can take the long-sleeved shirt off and just leave the t-shirt on, you know. It's going to get hot."

His shoulders slumped in relief, "Really, Aya-chan? Tobi looks good?" I got up to straighten out his shirts and "accidentally" poked him in the side. With a squeak, he jumped away, and I laughed. 'One down, two to go.'

"Yes. Go ahead and change back, Tobi. I'm sure the other clothes I got for you will be fine."

Deidara peeked his head around his stall's door, "I think I'm ready. I don't know if I got the shirt on right, un." I motioned to him with a hand.

"Well, come out and let me see."

Deidara was extremely...interesting to try to outfit. I had gotten him dark-rinse jeans (not pencil jeans; I _don't_ do emo kids) and a dark red t-shirt with a gold dragon face on the front, and the body on the back. Several of his shirts were similar in style, so if this worked, I was done shopping for him. It wasn't skintight (that would've made girls faint) and he kept his ninja sandals. Thank heaven their shoes are black...I would've had a serious problem otherwise.

I made him turn around and try walking up and down the aisle, "accidentally" poking again in the process. Deidara didn't flinch. Unfortunately. 'Not ticklish. So I've only got Hidan left...maybe I shouldn't try it. Actually, that sounds like a very good idea.'

"Well, do you like what you're wearing? Is it comfortable?"

"Enough, un. No fighting in it, though. It wouldn't last, un." I nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, these would be your 'public' clothes. Only to blend in." Deidara ambled back to his stall and began to change out of his clothes, and Hidan stepped out.

"These clothes feel so damn weird dammit..."

I didn't really hear what he was saying because, to be honest (which can be a pretty rare occurrence) I was staring at him.

And he looked _fine_. God-DANG.

Not that he was wearing totally different clothes from everyone else, but--wow.

I got him a pair of light-rinse jeans and he picked out his own long-sleeve shirt. In black, there was a hazard sign that said _"Warning! Comments may be laced with sarcasm!" _Like the other two, he kept his ninja sandals. And, thankfully, his shirt didn't cling. I snapped out of it when the object of my interest waved a hand in front of my face.

"Dammit, Aya, anyone in there? What is it? By Jashin, I've been calling you for five minutes!" I quickly covered up my staring at him by saying brightly,

"You're pretty!"

"Well, shit, then, I sure as hell am not going to wear-" I interrupted hastily,

"I meant you look good. Jeez, Hidan, can't you calm down?"

He smirked and I looked towards the other stalls absentmindedly, "Well, girl, ya coulda just said so, dammit."

I shrugged and, while wating for my other two charges, called Catherine to check on her progress.

_"Hello?"_

"Hey, Catherine. How's it going?"

_"Alright so far. My parents are going to have a cow, though. This stuff's expensive."_

_"I said that we could pay for it ourselves, Catherine-san-"_

_"I will be damned if you guys use stolen money to pay for things. No, we'll do this honestly."_

"Catherine, you're picking up Hidan's bad habits," I said dryly.

_"Thank you, Captain Obvious."_

"Your sarcasm is absolutely wounding, dear. Well, I'll leave you to your fun. I'm about done with my charges, so I'll call if we head to the food court."

_"By the way, Aya, which card are you using?"_

"The platinum."

_"Alright. That should work. Bye. And wish me luck."_

_"Good-bye, Aya-san."_

"Bye, Catherine and company." I hung up and redialed for Rian. By now, Tobi and Deidara had emerged and we waited in the checkout line.

_"Yo."_

"Sasori, why do you have the phone?" The line inched forward as I spoke.

_"Rian was being unpleasant, Aya-san. So I am keeping out of her reach as we speak. Zetsu and Itachi-san--I dare say it--are somewhat amused."_

"Don't tell me Itachi's smiling. And I missed it. But what did you do to Rian? Please tell me you haven't killed her."

_"Not yet. **Unfortunately for us, Sasori is being adamant that she doesn't die.**"_

"Well, skippy for him, then. She is the only one that can pay for your things. Speaking of clothes--"

_"Hello, Aya-san. Yes, we have clothes. Your friend nearly fainted when Itachi brought her one of the shirts he wanted, though..."_

"Hi again, Sasori. Why?"

_"Well, he got something called a-a-something with a turtle-"_

"Turtleneck?"

_"Yes. And she wasn't very happy. It was by someone named Ralph Laur-laur"_

I snickered, "Ralph Lauren? I didn't know Itachi had it in him. He does have expensive taste, after all."

I finally reached the front of the line, swiped my card, and made the ninja carry their respective bags.

"They're quite expensive, Sasori, so I'm not surprised. But Rian is alright?"

_"Yes, Aya-san. She's quite well. We will be finished soon. Rian wants to know what you'll be doing."_

"We'll probably go up the elevators to the food court. Tell her that, please. And we'll see y'all there, if you're going."

_"Goodbye, Aya-san."_

"Bye, Sasori." I hung up and we started to walk out of the store. The ninjas trailed behind me, and I suddenly had the feeling of being a mother goose or duck with her chicks following after her. I chuckled and moved to the left, pressing the button for the elevator to come down.

Hopefully, nothing was going to happen _this_ time...

* * *

**HELLO!! Anyway, I hope people liked this chapter...this is only part 1. Part 2 I think people will find much more entertaining. **

**Again, I apologize for not updating sooner. Yes, I know I really suck cuz I hadn't. I hope all y'all lovely readers will forgive me.**

**So.**

**[1] I going to say this now; TOBI AND AYA WILL NOT BE GETTING TOGETHER. We all know who Tobi really is, people. I've already had people ask about my main OC's attitude towards him, and the answer is a big fat NO. If you couldn't tell, I'm thinking about setting her up with Hidan. As for the others, well...**

**...you'll just have to wait and see. HEE HEE!! :P**

**[2] Utility colors (for those who do not shop much, or are guys in general) are those that "go" with everything and are considered okay for almost every occasion. They are (from what I remember): White, black, grey, and beige. There may be more; if there are, PM me, please!**

**Don't forget to review review review! And thanks to all my other lovely readers who had obliged me!**

**Regards,  
Ice**


	6. Elevator Adventures

**Title:** This Just Isn't My Day: Chapter 5: Part 2

**Author:** Ice-Eagle Y'siri

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Naruto, the Akatsuki, or any other associated characters. So far, I own Aya, Rian, and Catherine.

**Summary:** Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

**THANKS FOR ALL THE REVIEWS!! I don't think that this point really gets stressed enough, but authors and authoresses really love reviews; we love to hear how good we're doing and how we can improve.**

**You people wouldn't believe what it does to our egos. Honestly.**

**So thank you! Review, review, review!**

**And trust me, Tobi and Aya will NOT get together. EVER. *shudders*. Suggestions for Rian and Catherine? ****I know, if people haven't commented already, about Kakuzu. I COMPLETELY FORGOT!! EEEEEEKKKKK.**

**So he'll be somewhere in this chapter or the next one. Promise. Also, I've been trying to make each chapter longer than the last one, so bear with me. As a result, they may take longer.**

**Thank you, and enjoy!**

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_Hopefully, nothing was going to happen..._

Whoa, dude, I grinned to myself, what a cliché thing to say. Good grief. You'd think I'd know better by now. But whatever. They're only clichés, not portents of doom. The elevator dinged and opened—thankfully—empty.

"ONWARD!!" I cried as we stepped inside. I took my place by the control panel (I love pushing buttons. I can't think of anyone who doesn't).

"You're such a damn do-, dor-"

"-Dork, Hidan? Why thank, you. I love compliments." With that, I brushed off his statement and made the elevator doors shut, then pressed another button for the second floor. We waited semi-silently; that is, Deidara couldn't shut up.

"Wow, un. How are we moving? What happens if we fall down the other way? How fast can it go, un? Who makes—"

Tobi and I sighed. We knew this would end ba—

KAH-FWUMP. The elevator shuddered and we all staggered, but didn't fall.

**KAH-FWUMP.** This one did, however. Or technically, the shinobi fell gracefully to the ground and rolled while I cracked my head on the floor.

We all fell down, confused, and I looked up from my lovely position on the floor to see the ceiling hold up...but sagging the smallest bit. I guess the cord had broken off and partly fell on top, and the emergency weight had locked into place. Whoopie. Well, at least that's better than being crushed by the steel ceiling.

"Well, dang," I said dazily, "The elevator cord broke. Aren't we lucky."

Everyone else was in a state of getting up and shaking the FWUMP out of their ears. I didn't blame them. That was _really_ loud. Our clothes thankfully stayed in their bags, so I was able to use one as a convenient pillow. Deidara and Hidan stood up while Tobi sat alongside me. Personally, I coudn't see how they were able to stand yet. My ears were still ringing.

"Does this happen a lot in your world, Aya-chan?" I shook my head as I sat up.

Or tried, anyway. My head reeled for a moment and I sat up much more slowly, still using the bag of clothes as a pillow for the wall.

"Aya-chan, are you okay?"

I blinked rapidly and said carefully, "I'm not sure. My head really hurts. And I hate vegetables. And fruits. And corn."

"Where does corn fit in with this, un? It's not part of the fruits or vegetables, un. It's a grain."

I blinked owlishly at Deidara.

"Well, damn. Looks like someone got whacked by a fuckin' car." My mind cleared temporarily.

"Where the heck did you hear _that_?"

"Your midget friends wouldn't shut the hell up while we were walking earlier."

My mind immediately powered down again after that brief conversation. Ow. Ooooooowwwwww...

"Hidan, we need to get out of here, un."

The white-haired shinobi scowled at the grinning pyro, "I know that, dumbass."

I began to try to stand, using the wall as a support. Normally, this stuff didn't happen to me. Heck, this stuff wasn't supposed to happen to me. This was supposed to happen to Rian or Catherine. I only created the crazy incidents, not became part of one. It's an unspoken Rule of Nature. Not that mine ever got this extreme. I wouldn't risk seriously hurting someone, only their pride. Who to blame...it was the shinobi's fault. All their fault. Well,not Tobi. But the other two's fault. That's better.

Now that I think about it, thinking of the other groups in an elevator was scary to daydream about.

I would've shuddered, but my head hurt too much. It so figures. The one who gets hit in the head also has the migraine tendency...not fair.

"Aya. Why the hell are you getting up?"

I blinked slowly and concentrated on what I was going to say, "Our phones don't work in here. The emergency phone in the elevator probably got disconnected. There's a panel on the--" I gathered my thoughts "--on the ceiling. I need to see where it is so you guys can move it."

"Why can't you do it on the ground, Aya-chan?" I shook my head very slowly.

"I get too sleepy. And that's not good. I got clocked pretty hard when the cable broke."

"Well, maybe if someone moved faster..." I glared at the shinobi standing up.

"Well, I don't have chocolate reflexes, so screw y'all."

Then I heard a sound as I peered at the ceiling. A sound so alarming that it made Tobi hide behind a pile of bags, and Deidara back up right in front of said ninja. It strikes fear into the hearts of all everywhere. Well, except me. But I have an injury. I'm not thinking straight anyway. So. Back to the scary sound.

Hidan.

Was.

Laughing.

Holy.

Shit.

That was when I knew, brain-addled as I was, that the world was going to end pretty freaking soon.

But I got distracted by something else far more important. I grinned triumphantly as I saw a small indent in the ceiling of the elevator,"Found it!"

"Did you hear what you just said, un?" I must've looked blank.

"Uh. Found it?" Deidara was laughing into his hands and Hidan smirked.

"No, idiot. Chocolate reflexes." I shrugged.

"Oh. My bad. I meant shinobi reflexes."

"Where the hell do you get chocolate ouf of shinobi?" I scowled darkly. I don't like being teased when I'm in pain. It makes me irritated. Hidan just laughed some more and I heard a giggle come out of the pile of bags. Tobi then must've felt my Glare of Doom, because the heap of clothing became mysteriously silent.

"My head hurts. And I want to get out of here. Are you guys gonna move the panel or not?"

"I say we blow it up, un."

I looked at Deidara disbelievingly, my eyes a little unfocused, "You cannot be freaking serious. You'd kill the rest of us along with yourself."

"Well, not me. But I'd be pretty pissed off."

"You're not helping. I'd like for all of us to get out safely, thankyouverymuch." I put a hand to my head absently and rubbed it.

"I was kidding. We blow it up, un. I use my special clay that won't cause a big boom, and we kick the thing aside and get out."

I frowned a little and Hidan was suddenly in front of me. He peered at my head and I felt the urge to look down.

"You really are hurt, aren't you? Damn."

"Gee, what gave you a clue?" I said sarcastically. Or tried. My head really hurts.

"Well, I thought you might be faking."

I stared incredulously, "_Why?_"

He smirked again and I felt my cheeks turn a little pink as I stared into his eyes. Pretty purple...

"Well, I thought you just wanted me to carry you out."

I looked over his shoulder at Deidara, who was laughing silently, "Really full of himself, isn't he?"

He was laughing too hard to speak, and just nodded. I moved my attention back to Hidan, who was _still_ smirking.

"Your face is going to freeze like that," I said cheerfully, "And now that you mention it, I might need someone to carry me. For one, I can't jump from wall to wall. Two, my balance is really screwy right now; I'm staying upright with all of my effort."

"How do you say that so cheerfully, un?"

"I might have a concussion. My personality's out of whack-," Hidan rolled his eyes,"-and Hidan's pretty." Hidan's eyes bugged. Well. That came out of nowhere. I think I'm going to regret it later.

Tobi's head suddenly popped out of the clothes, "Tobi help you, Aya-chan!"

I smiled gratefully at him and nodded to Deidara, "Thanks, Tobi. And go ahead, Deidara."

"Get down, then, un." I sqatted by Tobi and ducked my head. I heard a muffled _boom_ and peeked through my hands. I saw Deidara kick the panel out of the way, then scramble up. Hidan looked penetratingly at Tobi, nodded, then followed him out.

"Deidara, "I said dryly "looked very akward. Well, shall we?"

We both slowly stood and I leaned a little on Tobi as we moved toward the whole. With a "Don't move", Tobi lifted me up by the waist and I reached for the edge, but a pair of arms pulled me up and through and Tobi hopped out behind me. I looked up to see Hidan holding onto me. I raised an eyebrow.

"Um. Thanks?"

"You're welcome. Damn, girl, but you're heavy." I frowned.

"Has anyone ever told you you're rude?" The overly-dramatic sigh told me how often. I smirked and looked around. For all of my bravado, I've never actually been _inside_ an elevator shaft before, and wasn't sure I would be willing to repeat the experience. The roof, thankfully, wasn't very slippery, so I wouldn't have to worry about my already-doubtful balance. Although, it was very dark, except for the window that on the very top of the building. Wait. Window. What?

"Why-" I think my voice was beginning to become a little slurred, "-is there a window over an elevator shaft? That ssseeemmmms like a desssign flaw."

Deidara looked slightly concerned, "We need to get her out of here, un. Have Konan look at her head."

I glared at the blonde, "I sssssaid I have a concussion. Or something like that. And my head hurtsss. And we need to get _out_ of here before I go nuts."

"Hell, girl. I thought you already--"

"It would be a very good idea for you not to finish that sentence when I'm in sssuch a bad mood." Tobi snorted and I sighed. Why me?

"I say we destroy the window, un. Fastest way out."

"Can you do it without us being seen?" All three of the ninjas stared at me disbelievingly.

"Now I know that you've hurt yourself, un, " Deidara shook his head, "Really, un. Asking such an obvious and nearly insulting question to shinobi?"

"Tobi is worried. Tobi thinks that we should jump out of the window." I straightened from my slight leaning on Hidan's shoulder. Frankly, I was surprised he let me touch him, since he's only known me for a day and a half. Or maybe because I'd be less useful to him dead.

Yes, I thought resolutely, it's definitely the second thought.

"Don't forget your things. I'm not coming shopping with y'all agggain for a while after this."

Though there was some grumbling, I managed to get them to take all their things out first, then come back for me. Deidara scooped me up and we leaped back out of the shaft, right before the rescuers arrived. Perfect timing. Well, for Deidara, that is. I thought he was always late, or maybe that's just the episodes. This concussion of mine is really making me slow down my thought processes. Bleh.

I couldn't help but take in the view, as injured as I was. Admittedly, being about a 100 feet in the air is really cool...the view of the mall and surrounding buildings was awesome. And I cooled off very quickly, though the air was still hot outside...what a drag. And sunny. Such is the curse of Florida. Apparently, Tobi or Hidan managed to find the others inside the mall and were waiting by our cars. No sooner had Deidara landed than Rian and Catherine had me out of his arms and off to the side, checking to see how badly my head was hurt.

"God, girl, please, just scare me to death next time!" Rian explained, "Tobi--or Hidan, I forget which--said that you had a concussa-something?"

"Concussion," Catherine corrected absently as she felt my head, "And I have a feeling that you'll be driving back to the house, dear. I think it's taking all of Aya's strength to stand properly."

"Got that right," I winced, "And you wouldn't believe how random I was in the elevator..."

"Oh, I can guess, " said Konan behind me. I felt fingers gently touch my head and my eyes.

"You have a concussion, Aya-san, and you're not going to sleep until we get back to the house. Then we'll wake you every few hours. That means," She gave Hidan a _Look_ "No yelling in her ear or anything else remotely unpleasant. She has a "brain bruise" and I doubt if she wakes up to loud noises she'll be very happy with you."

"Damn straight, " I said grouchily, "Now I think that we'd better head home before I kill something. Or someone. I'm getting very irritated. And spacey, if that makes any sssense."

Konan patted my hand as I was led towards my car, "That's normal, Aya-sa--"

"--Aya-chan. You just prodded my head to see if I was okay. I think we're more informal now."

The blue-haired woman smiled slightly.

"Aya-chan, this is normal. So far. I'll have Tobi or Deidara or your other companions make sure you don't fall asleep. And don't even think about trying with your eyes open."

I just looked at Konan quizically. How on Earth would I do that? Only Elves from LOTR and Gandalf did that. And I'm not an Elf, the last I checked. Then, my expression perked up slightly.

"Can I hit people with an empty paper towel roll? That'll help me stay awake." I heard Rian trying to muffle her laughter and I looked askance at Pein. Up until now, as with the other Akatsuki members, he'd been fairly quiet. Or maybe I was mixing quiet with satisfaction of his emo purchases at Hot Topic. Kakuzu looked like a walking luggage rack for him and Konan.

He said finally, "I don't see why not. This once, it'll be chalked up to your concussion and being unable to think clearly."

I beamed a bright and happy sun ray.

I then heard Tobi giggle and Hidan start cursing. Deidara said, "Duh-un!"

And as I got in the car, my smirk turned into a _very_ large smile.

* * *

**Hello! As usual, please review review review!**

**I hope you liked this chapter!**

**I know it's not as funny as my other chappies, but they will get more humorous in the future. I just cranked this out in a couple of hours, and I seemed to sound okay to me.**

**Don't forget, either say in your reviews who Rian and Catherine should be stuck with or PM me! Or just say whether or not they should stay single.**

**Personally, as an authoress, I say that if they got crushes on someone in the Akatsuki, life would be much more entertaining for them. Then I wouldn't have to worry about making more OCs. **

**But, I also listen to my faithful readers, so please tell me your opinion. The elevator idea came from my best friend ShikaSennyo, who shares the account with another best friend of mine. When she told me when I asked for ideas, I was like, "YES!!"**

**So. Thanks again for reading, and please review review review, even if you're anonymous and not officially a member. I'd love to hear from you! As usual, no flames, or you can, but I'll cackle in unholy glee.**

**Regards,**

**Ice**

**PS: Over 3,000 words! Finally! Next stop, 4,000! I rock!**


	7. Waking up and Neon Orange

**Title**: This Just Isn't My Day: Chapter Six

**By**: Ice-Eagle Y'siri

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Naruto, the Akatsuki, or any other associated characters. So far, I own Aya, Rian, and Catherine.

**Summary**: Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

**Thanks for all the reviews and reviewers! You know--though it is kind of early to say this--I'm surprised at how well my story is doing. I'm a sucky updater, even though I (no ego here, honestly) am not that terrible of a writer. But off of that, thanks to all who did review (you are strongly encouraged to continue) and for those just reading this for the first time, I recommend that you do review, because then I'll know what I need to improve and so on. **

**I take all reviews to heart except flames. Those I use to make fudge. Yuuuummm...**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

The first thing I noticed when I woke up is that my head hurt.

Tremendously.

If I hadn't known it to be scientifically impossible, I would've sworn that a monkey or something had gotten trapped in my head and was trying to pound its way out. Oy.

I didn't open my eyes, wanting to orient myself by sound and touch first. As a trainer _and_ with both my parents being doctors, I knew better than to try and sit up quickly with a head injury. I heard faint strains of _Wicked_ playing outside my door, and I figured that Catherine was practicing for her part in the musical. It was going to take place in late August.

I felt my blankets around me and relaxed a little more. Being brave, I slowly opened my eyes and blinked. Then blinked again. And again. I was fairly sure that this was my room, but I _knew_ that my ceiling wasn't this color. It was just plain white. Not this-this-

-Neon orange. Good God. Didn't they know that this made all things associated with the head (in my case) made things worse and not better? At least Rian and Catherine could've warned them...

Good God.

"Catherine. Rian," my voice wasn't loud, but it did project, "Come here. Now."

The _Wicked_ music was turned off and my door was cracked open. My two best friends crept in and shut the door quickly, then sat cross-legged on the bed, Catherine on my right, and Rian on my left.

"What is that." It wasn't a question.

"Well-" "You see-" they looked at each other and Catherine motioned for Rian to continue.

"First of all, we're glad you're up. Having to wake you up every few hours was tiresome, since no one else besides us and Konan would do it."

Catherine scowled, "Yeah. Everyone else got so _crabby_ and stuff, and you weren't helping. We had to move all the objects that you could whack us with out of reach of the bed. You were one scary sleeper, hon. We knew you normally weren't like that, but it was still...weird."

Normally I was a restless sleeper, and was fairly "bleak-like-a-mammoth" in the morning. Which meant I didn't wake up until I had my coffee. Or milk. Or water. I don't and never will drink soda. Too much sugar. The fact that I was such a crabby sleeper said a lot about what I was like when I wasn't myself.

"Well, sorry-" Rian tapped my shoulder.

"Don't apologize. You're hurt. In the head. No joking. You can't help how you act until you get better."

I shrugged as well as I could laying down.

"So...who did it. I'm still irritated." Rian grimaced.

"It was Hidan. Or at least, that's our guess. Since ya beat him practically to death with a paper towel roll on the way home...he got sort-of mad."

I sighed.

"So basically he's pissed but not in a killing rage. Lovely. This just isn't my day, and I just woke up. Jeez." Catherine was bemused.

"Haven't I heard that somewhere?"

"What?"

"The 'this just isn't my day' phrase. I could've sworn that I know it from something...man, this'll drive me nuts till I remember what it's from."

"_I_ haven't heard it before..." I tried not to laugh. Though we never told Catherine this, a lot of the times the stuff that she forgot she didn't remember she forgot until later. She was like Dory from _Finding Nemo_ that way.

Catherine grinned, " So you read it, huh?"

"What?" Her smile faltered.

"You mean you didn't see it? Aya, it was painted in orange. How in the world did you miss it?" Rian pointed upward and I looked up, then nearly swore and settled for a scary grumble instead. Across my ceiling was:

_"So you think I'm pretty, huh?"_

_

* * *

_

I sat up-slowly and very carefully- and scratched my arm.

"Well, " I said dryly, "This should make life more interesting."

"Aya-chan, that is the biggest understatement of the century." I jumped, but turned only to see Konan just inside the door. I hadn't seen the blue-haired woman (that I remembered, anyway) since I had gotten out of the car.

"Think of it this way," I said cheerfully, "It could be-"

"DON'T SAY IT!!" I winced as Rian covered my mouth.

"What was that for?" That hurt, dadgummit. My poor ears...they'll never work the same way again.

"You'll curse us all, you twit! Every time someone says it, life gets worse for them!" We all just stared at my friend. What. In. The. World.

"Where did you hear that from?"

Rian looked frantic, "It's true! I mean, I've said it before-"

"-just because something's happened to you, Rian-ow!"

"-and my life's gotten worse. I got dentention that one time for the spray paint thing, remember? I shouldn't have gotten caught. Then my idiot nephew said it, and the same thing happened!" Rian continued. I just sighed. Why couldn't I have....less odd...friends once in a while? Just once. Even for an hour. Maybe even five minutes.

"Back to the _original_ conversation, Aya-chan, that is the biggest understatement of the century." Catherine sat farther down the bed and rubbed her head. I could partially sympathize. Only partially. She's not the one that hit her head in a falling elevator, after all.

"Well, it's not like I did it on purpose, you know," I rubbed my own head; it was starting to throb, "How long've I been asleep?"

"We got back last night around 7 or 8, and it's 12:30. Pm. Obviously."

I smiled. Lunchtime. Food. I just now registered that I was very hungry. And my headache was starting to clear up at the mention of food. Fabulous!

"LUNCHTIME, LADIES!!"

"HONK!!!"

We all peeked our heads out of my bedroom, then stared at each other.

"What was that?"

Catherine looked at Rian and I, "Well, we picked up some other things besides clothes...this is the result."

I groaned, "Oh, God, Cat, you _didn't_. You let them buy bullhorns? Did they find the other one that we hid in the house from your cousin? Please tell me they didn't. "

"HONK!" HO-" the second one was quickly muffled and we heard a muffled "Idiot!" from downstairs. Lovely. Just what I wanted to deal with when I woke up this morning. Well, afternoon, technically. Now I get to help break up a fight between two or more psycho ninjas. This should be extremely fun. I'd better bring the camcorder for one of my friends to use.

"Well, actually--"

I contemplated knocking my head against the wall and making my concussion even worse. Why can't my friends stay out of trouble for five minutes? Well, normally we're the ones causing it, but we rarely actually got in the _middle_ of things.

"If Hidan has one of those, I'm moving out, I ain't lying." Really. That could be the perfect way of him getting back at me. An angry Hidan chasing me with a bullhorn was not on my agenda for today. Not that I knew my agenda yet, but Hidan definitely wasn't on it. At least, with a bullhorn, anyway.

"Please say you're not serious. You'd leave me alone with Rian and the rest of this psycho-ouch!"

I rolled my eyes, "Didn't I say I wasn't lying? Okay, then. But-" I swung my legs out of my bed and was able to stand, "-we will continue this discussion later. I wanna eat."

After I got dressed, we exited my room. We all trouped down the stairs slowly, myself being extra slow with the rail, just in case. I didn't relish the idea of falling down after I decided to not hurt myself. Arranged around the table and the side bar were our current denizens of the house. I sat down gingerly, ignoring the stares. Catherine was on my left, and Tobi took the seat on my right.

"So," I said cheerfully, "who was the idiot that decided to blow the horn when I've got a concussion? I'd like to thank them."

Dediara looked perplexed, "Why'd you like to thank them, un?"

I grinned, my mouth filled with macaroni and cheese, "Because they gave me the perfect excuse to kill them, of course. Duh."

There were coughs and muffled laughs all around the table. Kisame kept his hands under the said table, and I filed it for future reference. He was probably the culprit, and I could prank him later. Well, if one could prank a shinobi. I'm sure Konan would love to help me. Probably. Hidan grinned at me from a few places down.

"But you called me pretty."

I blinked. What did that have to do with anything? I repeated it out aloud.

"It's damn feminine, that's what."

I snorted, "Well, I won't be caught dead saying you're hot, if that's what you're wondering. And, well, you're _not_ hot, anyway."

"Aya! Don't say that! I don't want you to die!" Rian threw a pleading look across the table. Inside my head, however, my mind was cackling with glee. With a look, Catherine agreed to play along.

"Well,"I said defensively,"He's not. Seriously, do either of you think he's hot?"

Tobi shrugged, "Tobi is a boy, Aya-chan."

I ate another bite of my lunch before replying, "So? You could still have homosexual leanings that none of us know about. What about you, Catherine?"

Tobi choked on his food, Kakuzu then pounded his back, and Kisame guffawed. The rest of the table shook their heads or snickered. Catherine, in the meanwhile, eyed the silver-haired shinobi critically.

"Well, the no shirt thing really doesn't do it for me, to be honest. And his white hair makes him look old." I leaned forward to hide my face. I didn't think that she'd say _that_. I mean, that's _cold_. Ouch. I was sure that I would break out in laughter at any second. Hidan was absolutely furious. Actually, not absolutely furious. I'd be dead.

"So I'm not _masculine_ enough for you bitches?"

"You're masculine," I conceded, "But not hot. And you do look probably 8-10 years older than you already are."

While he sat sputtering, Rian asked Pein, "So what's the plan for today, oh estimable Akatsuki leader?"

Pein had finished his lunch and was watching the rest of us quietly, Konan at his side. The blue-haired woman looked like she was trying to muffle a laugh or two. Pein's expression was undreadable.

"We need space to spar without distractions. Or watchers."

I leaned back in my chair, "I am re-elegating that duty to Rian. I'm using my 'I'm sick get out of doing anything card'. 'Sides, I can't drive or whatever anyway."

"Poor baby." I grinned at Cat's sarcastic remark. Ah, to have a functioning brain again. What a wonderful, wonderful, thing.

"Oh, yes. Woe is me. I feel the pity raining down from all you ruthless souls. See me bask. See me bask in it _all_."

I cleared my place and--taking a cue from me--my friends and the other shinobi did the same. I started to wash dishes while this was going on. It was one of my ingrained habits from home, and Catherine began drying dishes that I had finished washing, while Rian put away. The rest of the shinobi were seated around the table. Tobi and Konan tried to help, but I waved them off back to their seats.

"Your sarcasm is as good as ever, un."

I grinned at Deidara gleefully, "Why, thank you. It's nice to know I haven't gotten rusty."

**"That's what she said."**

"Don't do that to them. It's not nice."

**"But we aren't nice, so why bother trying?"**

I just gaped. Say...what? What?

"My eyes! Dammit, Zetsu! The images!"

I shook my head and blinked. It still hadn't completely registered. My confusion must've shown on my faces, because Catherine scowled at me.

"Just be glad you have a concussion, Aya. You don't want to know."

Wait. Wha-oh. Um. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

I glared at the plant ninja, "You realize that I'll probably have to knock myself out again to get all of what just happened out of my head. Thanks. Thanks so _very_ much. Really. I had looked forward to this this morning. I really did."

"Should I throw the soap at him?"

I shook my head at Catherine, "No, he might eat it. Or get it on the floor."

**"Thanks for talking like I'm not here."**

I glowered at the cannibalistic ninja, "You're welcome."

I turned to finish the dishes. My best friends followed my example, and we studiously ignored the ninjas sitting at our table. Not that they didn't try to get our attention. They didn't throw anything at me, but the other two would probably have sore heads in a few hours. After I threatened them with the spray hose-thing on the sink, most of them drifted off, except for Konan and Tobi. Rian leaned towards me secretly.

"So, you really think Hidan's pretty?"

I rolled my eyes, "I wouldn't have said it if I didn't mean it. That doesn't mean I like him."

It was Catherine who rolled her eyes this time, "Yeah. Sure. Please, sweetie, we know you like a book."

I huffed, "Not in this case. And it's-it's-"

"What? Tobi is confused." My best friends and I finished the dishes and then Konan and Tobi and the rest of us moved outside on the back porch.

"It's _Hidan_, for crying out loud! And the guy went and painted on my ceiling. In. NEON ORANGE. He's pretty, but _come on_."

"Tobi agrees with Aya-chan."

"I mean, NEON ORANGE. What in the world--," I sputtered, "--well. Eh. I'll have to kill him later. Metaphorically, of course. I wonder if he's a closet pervert like Kakashi besides being a sadist for his religion."

Catherine and Tobi snickered we situated ourselves on the porch railing. After reconsidering, I moved myself onto a nearby chair on the porch. Rian pulled a chair over from farther away, then sat on it backwards.

"This reminds me. Don't you have to leave soon, Rian?"

My best friend shook her head, "No, not for a couple minutes. And I'm liking this conversation. Besides, I've got Konan with me. Pein won't leave without her. And I'm taking Catherine with me as support when y'all come with me."

"So will anyone be staying here?" Rian shrugged. Well. This is nice. Maybe I can get a start on my summer reading and get at least one paper done before they get home.

"Probably one person to keep an eye on you. What if you fall down the stairs again?" Catherine arched an eyebrow.

I huffed, "Cat, that was only once. And Rian's idiot nephew pushed me. Or one of his ex-girlfriends did because the twit thought I was hitting on him. Gag me with a spoon. The guy has more girlfriends than Rian has shoes. It's amazing they don't run into each other coming and going."

Rian frowned a little, "Come on. Family habit at work. And besides, he's not that bad. In fact, he can be pretty cool most of the time."

At my look, she amended her statement, "Well, once in a while he can be a jerk."

"Thank you."

"Rian-chan, Catherine-chan, we need to go." We stood and I gave my best friends big hugs. I could see the driveway and part of the street from the back porch, so I waved until I couldn't see the cars anymore.

My hands rubbed together in glee. Now, what could I accomplish while they were gone...Homework! Then I'll have the rest of vacation school-worry free! YES.

"Just where do you think you're going, Aya-san?" I moved onward to my room, Kisame following close behind. I left the door open so Kisame could hear what was going on. After all, I didn't have mad ninja skills to get us out of trouble. Or hear anyone coming. That was his job, not mine. Thankfully. I'd probably throw a screwdriver at the door by accident, with my luck, if someone happened to break in. Or, knowing me, it'd come back and hit me on the head, knocking me out. Again.

"I'm about to check my email, read one of my summer reading books, then start one of my papers for school. You?"

The shark man shrugged. Poor guy. He's gotta be bored out of his mind. I wonder why he got stuck with 'lil ol me. I pulled Rian's desk chair out of her room and into mine, then motioned for Kisame to sit down. Taking my place near him and in front of the keyboard, I began to teach him the basics of a computer.

"Now," I started, "This is the Internet..."

* * *

**Yo! I know it's kinda...flat. But it'll get better. I hadn't realized that I hadn't updated in so long (as usual)!**

**I am such a procrastinator. I cranked this out in a coupla hours. I promise I'll pace myself better next time. And computers don't exist in the Naruto world (that's how I'm writing it) but TVs do. So don't be surprised about any upcoming computer tutorials. And no, it won't get too technical jargonized. I have some ideas for it.**

**Now, feel free to comment. Serious characterizing is going to be going on for a while, and the usual silliness and funniness in between.**

**I hope you guys liked this chapter!**

**Hugs,**

**Ice**

**PS: No flames. As usual. Constructive cricicism, please. Thanks!**


	8. Discussions and Spaghetti

**Title:** This Just Isn't My Day

**By:** Ice-Eagle Y'Siri

**Disclaimer:** Don't own Naruto or the Akatuski or anything associated with Naruto.

**Summary:** Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the heck out of the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

* * *

_"Now," I started, "This is the Internet..."_

_7 hours later..._

It was now close to seven thirty in the evening, and I had been pulled out of my room by Kisame to see everyone else arrive and dash into their rooms. I had to admit, the breeze that they created while moving so fast was quite refreshing. I had managed to finish one summer reading paper and was working on the next when I heard the slam of our front door, then a couple of _fwumps_ from downstairs. Hearing some grumbles and groans, I moved to see what the source of the noise was.

_'Well'_, I thought as I looked around my kitchen and the human tangle of my two best friends sprawled on the ground,_ 'this wasn't what I expected. Though I suppose I should have by now.'_

"Well, aren't you going to help us up?" I raised an eyebrow at my friends.

"Just what did you do to drop down on the ground like this?" Rian and Cat grimaced at the same time.

"Rian pissed off Kakuzu and well, you know how he is when he's mad..."

I just crossed my arms and leaned myself against the counter, still not helping them up, "Please, do inform me. I want to know what sort of mess you two got into this time around. At least you didn't spend six--no wait, _seven_--hours with a shinobi who was convinced he knew how to use a computer, then nearly blew up the damn thing, _then_ nearly punched a hole in my wall when it froze. After _that_ he tried to lock me in my room and sat sulking--"

"Aya-san, I was not _sulking_--"

"--outside my door until you all came home and then dragged me out when he saw you two on the floor."

"--I was just keeping watch until Leader-sama got back."

Catherine's mouth twitched, " Yeah, poor you. Pity us instead. As usual, Rian said a clueless comment--"

"--which wasn't really clueless at all, may I add--," Rian shut up when Catherine bopped her on the head.

"--and the next thing we both knew-though I still don't know how _I_ was brought into the whole mess-we were sent flying across the football field. Konan had the good sense to catch us both, and Kakuzu contented himself with a combination of tickle torture with those freaky thread things of his and chasing us around till we nearly passed out."

My eyes widened, "The football field? You mean the soccer practice field, right? My boys'll have to play on the real football field when school starts back up again, ya know. And why did you guys decide to come to the school, of all places? I didn't think you hated the place that much."

Rian waved a hand dismissively, "Yeah, yeah, the soccer football practice field whatever place. Besides, the fields are outside, and at night they won't be seen. Besides, it's not like they have alarms or security cameras on the fields, anyway. We remembered your precious American football team, Aya. Chill. And anways, Pein and Konan hated everywhere else we went that we could think of."

"That still doesn't really explain why--"

"--It has markers for our eventual body-throwing competition, "We all jumped as Kakuzu appeared in the living room, "And I'm assuming that Leader will be using you three as our bodies. Presumably."

Following behind, we all settled ourselves in our favorite chairs and couches. Myself, I had a squishy brown leather la-z-boi I liked reading in. Rian and Catherine made themselves comfortable on the couch, while Kakuzu relaxed in a window seat. Then what the Akatsuki member just said sank in.

"Wait. Us? What did _I_ do? Rian, what did you say to him?"

Rian (aka Best friend number one) looked uncomfortable, while Catherine (Best friend number two) managed the queer task of looking disgusted and amused. Confused, I looked back and forth between the two of them. Kakuzu was silent and stared at Rian.

"Why don't _you_ tell her?" Rian snuggled farther into the couch, scowling at the greedy Akatsuki member.

"Do you want the threads chasing you again? I thought you learned the first time around. Better yet, I'll have Sasori make you his puppets for an hour."

Seeing movement on the ceiling, I flickered my gaze up and then down again, smirking. Being threatened with that frightening possibility, Rian let out a little shriek and finally fessed up, "I asked about his hearts."

Satisfied with making his point clear, Kakuzu looked out the window, content not to talk. I raised my eyebrows, "His hearts. You asked about his hearts. And he didn't kill you."

My best friend looked sheepish, "Well, not really his hearts. More like the mask things that cover his hearts. They're so creepy looking; they look like those Japanese whatchamacallems--uh--"

I suggested dryly, "-Noh masks?"

Rian beamed, "YES! Why couldn't he have at least one smile or something?"

Cat and I exchanged a glance. Rolling my eyes at Catherine, I replied, "Well, they serve their purpose, don't they?"

"Yeah," Rian frowned, "But they could psyche out the enemy even more. Well, even more than a freakish black thing lobbing Fireballs Of Doom would, I suppose."

Shaking my head, I focused on Kakuzu and the mass on the ceiling, "Back on the original conversation: One, I'm nobody's dummy for a body-throwing competition. Two, using genjutsu on me or my friends is cheating, Sasori, especially when you know we can't use jutsu or anything like that."

"WHAT? HE'S HERE AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME? AYA!!" I blinked innocently at the two troublemakers on the couch, then frowned at the freakishly loud volume. My headache was on the verge of coming back. I'll have to take some Advil or something soon.

"What?" Kakuzu looked up, waved, then turned his attention back outside.

"That's bordering on Satanic treatment! I don't want to die anytime soon!"

The black shadow faded into Sasori as he dropped to the ground, then somehow glided over to one of the remaining la-z-bois, "And I suppose becoming my puppet for a short time would have fit into that category?"

And Kakuzu said, "And? So what?"

Rian huffed, "Well, duh. I hate being controlled. Number two, I forgot that we were dealing with one of the most secular people in the world *cough* Kakuzu *cough*. Yeesh. Yeah, it sucks. Ninjas. _Hmpf_."

"I think the fact that the Akatsuki are ninjas is well-established, Rian-san. Kakuzu-san, isn't there some financial prize for the farthest body thrown in the body competition?"

I threw up my hands, "Why are we still talking about this? I'm not a body!"

"Who the hell's not a body?"

Hidan strode down the steps and leaned against the doorway and I pinched the bridge of my nose, "Oh, god. Another one. Just watch, Deidara is going to appear next. Why us?"

"Who the hell said they're not a damn body?"

I glared at all the fingers pointed at me, "I did, but I meant for the body-throwing competition."

I curled up in a ball when I saw Hidan scan me slowly up and down, then grin, "I feel violated. Get him to quit staring, seriously."

"Aw, poor little Aya doesn't like men checking her out?" I lobbed a pillow at the silver-haired ninja, which he ducked, calling out, "But Aya most definitely has a _body_."

I looked pleadingly at my friends, who looked as helpless as I did. Curling up even tighter in my chair, I pulled the blanket that was hanging over the back off and hid myself under it. Kakuzu (now that Sasori had mentioned money) had actually turned his head toward the center of the room and looked like he was paying a little attention to what was going on. Whoopee. Sasori, in the meanwhile, had leveled himself out of his seat and took a seat opposite Kakuzu and began to speak to him quietly, head lowered.

"I meant for the body-throwing competition, you twit. Now quit staring, or I'll sic Tobi on you."

Hidan scoffed at my threat, "Like I'm scared of that pansy. Gods above and below, the damned fool wouldn't even kill a baby rabbit."

I frowned, "Well, he couldn't have gotten in Akatsuki for nothing, though. And who would kill a baby rabbit? They're adorable, " then my eyes widened, "You've killed a baby rabbit? Why? Don't tell me you've used one for a ritual!"

Catherine and Rian had maneuvered themselves very quietly back in the sofa and peeked over the backside of it, watching our conversation. Catherine, hearing this, mouthed 'What the heck are you doing?' I just shook my head at my best friend.

The silver-haired ninja snorted, "Of course not. There isn't enough life force for Jashin in a baby rabbit. Yeesh. Besides, a shinobi's gotta have limits. And they taste gross."

"YOU'VE EATEN ONE?!" I shrieked, "A HARMLESS BABY RABBIT? HOW COULD YOU?"

Hidan rolled his eyes, "Jashin damn it all, Aya, calm the fuck down. And it was forty-ish years ago."

"A BABY RABBIT? WHY?"

Sasori and Kakuzu were drawn back into the conversation by my cries, looking bemused.

"Aya-san," asked Sasori cautiously, "What did Hidan-san do?"

I pointed an accusing finger at the accused man, "He ate a baby rabbit!"

Kakuzu raised an eyebrow and said, "And?" just as Sasori replied, "So?"

I threw up my hands in defeat, "Ninjas! A. BABY. RABBIT."

While I sat sputtering, Rian and Catherine attempted to explain.

"You see, "Catherine began, "Aya used to have rabbits as did I, actually. Her name was Starry Night. And before she had pet rabbits, her and her family rescued baby rabbbits and took them to the shelters or released them into a wildlife preserve. So she's flabbergasted that Hidan would eat a baby rabbit. Although, " her nose wrinkled, "I do see her point. Eating a baby rabbit--much less killing one--would be gross. And sad. I couldn't do it."

Hidan had begun to look exasperated, "Jashin, Aya, it's just a baby rabbit. What's the deal? Sure, females think it's cute, but it's not like it missed out on a helluva lot anyway."

"You took away the chance of it having lots of little rabbits or running in freedom or smelling flowers!" I raved, "You took away the life it might..have..." I trailed off, following a stray thought.

Wait, wait, wait. Hidan had to kill or whatever to Jashin to keep his immortality. What if he killed humans for their--

"Years, "My eyes widened, "You ki-mmmph!" I gaped at the hand that covered my mouth, then was caught in his violet eyes.

"If you know any better, " Hidan rumbled, "You will not continue that sentence. Yes, it's what you think it is."

He slowly moved his hand away from me and backed off from my chair. My eyes narrowed at him, "That still doesn't change the fact that you killed a baby rabbit. And ATE it, for crying out loud."

Hidan rolled his eyes, "Can't we get off the Jashin-be-damned subject? I'm getting bored."

It was my turn to roll my eyes. Jeez, if I kept this up, my headache would come flying back. Not good for one who had a concussion, "Like your attention span is that great, anyway. What a surprise. What must be done to entertain you?"

The vulgar ninja grinned lecherously, "Well, having an orgy with a couple of--"

I covered my ears, "ARGH! NO FREAKING WAY! Virgin ears over here! Not in our house, thank you!"

All of the people in the room looked vaguely surprised, "You're a virgin, Aya?" asked Cat.

I blinked confusedly at her, "Well, I could ask a really stupid question that you would probably viscerate me for, so I won't. But duh, I'm a virgin. I don't want to get knocked up during senior year. Besides, my parents would probably disown me. And the issue has never really come up so far in my high school career."

Hidan sat himself on the floor in front of my chair, "Now this is definitely interesting. Please, tell me more."

"I wouldn't, Aya-san, "Sasori's voice held a warning, "Hidan-san has the biggest mouth in the Akatsuki, if not in the ninja countries."

"Please, Aya-san," Kakuzu jumped in, "This isn't something I particularly want to know about."

I looked over to Cathering and nodded, then focused on Hidan, who was chortling, "Kakuzu-teme said please? Holy shit, man. You must be special, Aya, if you could get him to say please. It almost, "Hidan winked and I glared, "makes me jealous."

I just sighed. Hidan. What a punk. And a jerk. Cute, though--no, bad thoughts, bad thoughts!!

" Well, whatever, " I shrugged, " I don't want to talk about my sex life with you. Stuff like that is personal."

The sighs of relief were probably audible from a hundred yards away. Yeesh. I didn't think that they minded that much. Crikey. Hidan turned himself around so he faced me on the floor, " Aw, you don't trust me?"

I just stared.

He's a ninja. An AKATSUKI S-class ranked ninja who's a sadistic bastard who has no reservations when it comes to killing people. He uses his rituals to prolong his own life and make him literally impossible to kill, betrayed his village, ate a baby rabbit (maybe more), and maybe killed his own family. Well, I might be exaggerating on the last one. And he has the almighty gall to ask about trust.

Good Christ.

"Duh. What did you think, I was Tobi? Not that I don't like him or anything..."

The violet-eyed ninja scowled at my friends' sniggers. Sasori and Kakuzu weren't helping by smirking, well, evilly. They are mass murderers, after all.

"I'm surprised," Rian piped up when Hidan looked about to explode, "That all of you ninja are so tolerant of us. Really. For supposedly psychotic ninja--"

"Rian! That's the second time you've put your foot in it today! " Catherine tried to hide herself under a manmade igloo that consisted of a grand total of three pillows. Smooth.

I snickered, "Well," I said thoughtfully, deciding to play along, "My friend does have a point, you know."

"Aya!"

I blinked innocently at the Talking Mound of Pillows That Was Cat on the couch, "What?"

We could all see the virtual steam climbing out of the Mound's earholes, "You know perfectly well what. Besides, I thought you were supposed to be the one with the sense of self-preservation, not me!"

"Now you know how I feel on a daily basis. Now you know what I put up with you people every single day. And you wonder about my sanity. Sheesh."

"Yeah, " Catherine's head peeked mournfully from behind the Mound, " I know. I actually feel...like I got to worry about you guys and getting in," her nose wrinkled, "What's that word? Trouble."

"Isn't that what it's normally called anyway, Catherine-san?"

Rian grinned at Kakuzu maniacally, "No. We call it art."

"What you sense, oh young child, " Sasori's voice was dry, "is the wonderful feeling of responsibility. Unfortunately for you, it grows as you get older."

I blinked at the puppet master. Dang. I didn't realize that these shinobi could actually be profound, though I suppose Sasori would now be excluded from that group. Maybe Itachi had the mental capacity to be philosophical, but he's too creepy and cold to pull it off successfully.

I jumped in thoughtfully, "I would have called it a conscience, but that works too, I suppose."

"Why thank you, O Wise One."

My eyes crinkled at Sasori and Cat. Rian spoke up again, " Well, back to what I had been saying earlier--"

I abruptly stood, pushing off of Hidan's shoulder, "-and that's as far we'll get on that subject, Rian. At least until later. I'm off to fix dinner."

"The hell? Can you be anywhere near the damned food and not kill us all if you mess up?"

I beamed at the assembled group in the room, "Good point. Well, who's volunteering to help?"

*cricket silence*.

*long cricket silence*. I glared. Everyone just stared back.

*the cricket got hoarse and shut up*

Fed up, I rolled my eyes, "Fine. I'll ask Zetsu to help out. I'm sure you guys would love what _he'd_ eat."

The sudden rush of volunteers was both gratifying and hilarious. Moving past them into the kitchen, I warned, "I caution you, I listen to music while I cook. If you got issues, say so now or forever hold your peace."

"Damn, I'm out. I'll burn the Jashin-be-damned water if I'm trying to listen and cook at the same time. Later, bitches, " Hidan exited with a cackle.

Sasori (no suprise here, since he technically didn't have to eat) opted out as well along with Kakuzu, who went to see if he could find a ''decent money-making kill office in this world''. I reminded him to change and he responded with a dismissive flick of his fingers before leaving.

Shaking my head, I opened the medicine cabinet, "Ye gods, they make me feel old. And they're all older than us!"

"Yeah, I think Deidara's the closest in age to us, though," Rian looked around the pantry, "What are we making, by the way?"

"Spaghetti." I swallowed my Advil and took out a strainer from the adjacent cabinet.

Rian nodded, "Okay. Isn't Deidara like, nineteen or something?"

Catherine stared, "God, he can't be that young."

I looked quizzically at her. I had been plugging my Mp3 into my portable speakers, "Why not?"

"He looks like he's in his twenties, at least."

My head cocked to the side and I pressed Play on my Sony. While "Lloraré Las Penas" drifted through the air, I filled a pot with water and set it to boil on the stove, "I didn't think he looked quite that old, but okay. He does seem old-ish for a nineteen year old, though. I pegged him at about twenty, twenty-oneish."

Catherine, while we were talking, had started preparing the sauce and setting out the dishes, " That is twenties, Aya."

I smirked and dumped a couple boxes of noodles (bowtie) inside the pot and set the timer, "No, 20-22 is early twenties, not twenties. Hah."

"Whatever, Miss-Politically-Correct-who-shouldn't-even-be-thinking-straight-anyway-because-a-certain-someone-has-a-concussion."

"Do not be jealous of my miraculous healing skillz, Miss-I-can-outsing-anyone-on-the-flippin-planet."

"Children," Rian tapped our noses and we snorted at her, "We do need to make supper, you know."

I cackled, "Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's get back to work."

* * *

_1 and a 1/2-ish hours later...Rian, Catherine, and I had made spaghetti for dinner, but we forgot the Akatsuki didn't have forks to eat with, only chopsticks. So now dinner became an...interesting affair._

"How the hell do you eat this, woman?"

"Tobi thinks Kakuzu-chan looks like a tomato."

"I wasn't askin for your damn opinion, midget. And I'm NOT a girl. Now how the hell do I eat this?"

I sighed.

"Don't you people have forks or something?" Rian cheerfully (and expertly) twirled her pasta on her fork and popped the bite into her mouth. Itachi's eyes flashed red for a second and began to eat his food exactly the same way she was eating. Noticing this, I grinned.

"Well, Kakuzu," I said wickedly, "Itachi can manage, why not--"

I dodged the gob of spaghetti that came flying at me. Though I know I couldn't have done it if Kakuzu actually meant to hit me, the action also meant that he wasn't too angry with the people at the table.

Yet, anyway.

"Because the weasel has that damned bloodline, that's why!"

"Kakuzu, calm the fuck down. You'll get that red shit on me, dammit! OW! Tobi!"

"Hidan-sempai shouldn't cuss in front of a lady."

"Yeah, Hidan," Kakuzu glared venomously at his partner, "Don't cuss in front of your lady."

WTF? The silver-haired ninja and I exchanged stares, then shrugged at each other. I raised an eyebrow, he smirked, and I sighed and braced myself for whatever godawful joke was yet to come.

"Hot damn. Well," a leer and glare was exchanged, "She's got me flustered."

A loud thunk was heard as I bopped him on the head.

"Idiot!"I paused, then scanned Hidan's head thoughtfuly," Whoa, man. It really _is_ hollow."

"Ooooooohhhhhhhh."

"BURN!!" Rian cackled.

I laughed and Hidan just crossed his arms, "What the fuck ever, man. Pick on someone else for a change, bitch."

"Don't call your lady-slash-hostess a bitch, un." Deidara had already finished his plate; it was the mouths on his hands that had eaten the food. After belatedly hearing a slurping coming from his direction, I avoided looking at his arms. Catherine--who had to sit next to him during supper, poor girl--just shuddered and turned to talk to Konan and Sasori.

"I'll call her whatever the hell I want, dammit. Now bother Kisame!"

Cat, drawn by the ruckus that my end of the table was making, frowned in Hidan's direction, "Kisame's unflappable. It's almost impossible to piss him off."

"Maybe if you tried hitting on Itachi? Could Kisame be gay?"

"I was married, Rian-san."

...

...

...

The table exploded.

"WHAT?" "SINCE WHEN?" "HOW LONG?" "WHO?"

"YOU GOT FUCKIN' LAID? HOLY SHIT!!"

Kisame looked heavenward and pointed Samehada (which was what I thought was a mummy by the back door) at our noses, "Keyword is _was_, Hidan. She's been dead for a decade or so."

"Oh," I said softly, "I'm sorry."

The shark man shrugged, "Do not worry about it, Aya-san. It was political. And there was lots of money--on her side and mine--to persuade us both to be wed."

"YOU GOT LAID?? OOOOWWWW! AYA!"

I glared and put down my empty plastic water glass, "That's rude, Hidan! I know that's what you are naturally, but do show at least a little restraint."

"You telling me what to do, bitch?"

I glared at the rude ninja, "Yeah. Kisame'll sic Samehada on you and nothing'll stop him if you don't shut it."

"What the hell ever, dude," Hidan hmphed and turned his nose up at the table.

Shrugging, we went back to eating our food. Eventually, though, the silence got too disturbing and I asked brightly, "Sooooooooooooooo..."

"What, Aya?" Catherine asked tiredly. I forgot. She's been out with all of the Akatsuki all day and so has Rian. They're probably both exhausted. We should be getting to bed soon.

"Well, maybe we could go swimming or something after this concussion of mine clears up."

"Which will take how long?" Pein held my gaze and I shifted uncomfortably. Dangit, but the man was creepy sometimes.

"I don't know. A week--week and a halfish."

"We need to figure out how to get home, Pein," Konan said quietly, "Itachi, could you possibly start thinking of ideas tomorrow?"

The Uchiha only nodded his head and I rolled my eyes. What would it take to make the man actually talk, for crying out loud?

"Good. Pein, what do you think?"

The Akatsuki leader just shrugged, "Fine with me. I don't care, personally. Just stay out of trouble."

I grumbled, "You sound like my dad," just as Rian and Cat said simultaneously, "You sound like Aya."

My best friends exchanged deer-in-the-headlights looks and Tobi laughed.

"Aya-chan should see her face. It's very funny!"

"He's got a point, un."

I huffed, "I'll bet. Since the swimming idea is settled, and since Rian, Cat, and I aren't shinobi, we actually need decent hours of sleep--me especially because of this injury of mine--so we're going to clear out and go to bed. Just leave your stuff on the counter after rinsing them off."

Everyone just nodded and I turned back at the foot of the stairs, "And Hidan."

"What?"

I smiled maliciously, "I still need to get you back for painting my room."

I giggled evilly as a muffled, "Dammit!" drifted up the stairs.

After I changed, I turned out the light and fell asleep. I needed my rest, and I had a _lot_ of planning to do during the next week...

* * *

**Hello!**

**So I know that I haven't updated...in months...like I should have...and I'm really sorry! *cowers under desk* I had a crapload of paperwork to do, and then I just got stuck.**

**Seriously. I was staring at the computer thinking, "WRITE ALREADY!"**

**And nothing came. Not even a flicker. I had godawful writer's block. This took me about of week to write (in 1-2 hour actual writing periods) and then my brain just...froze. It was only because of my loyal readers and reviewers that I was able to even get te chapter started. I emailed my friend ShikaSennyo to read it and help me out, and that took even longer, and everything was just a royal pain in the butt.**

**The fact that Hinata is presumed dead currently in Naruto didn't help, either. Honestly. I just stared at the screen and was like 'WTFWTFWTFWTFWTF WHY?????!!!!!' How could Kishimoto _do_ that to her?! Hinata, hold on! I love you!**

**So. Suggestions for the continuing plotline? I know what I'm going to do towards the end, and I had the beginning already done, but now I'm stuck on the middle. Where should I go from here?**

**I'm also having a problem b/c of Nairo, Xana, and Jemmi's story _How are We Still Alive?_ keeps running around in my brain and I'm trying to make mine different from theirs and have it not be the same thing remotely so now I've hit a wall. Help!**

**I know I shouldn't worry too much b/c for their story it had three authors instead of one, but still. I'M NOT BLAMING THEM, BUT I AM SLIGHTLY FRUSTRATED. Raaawr. Yeesh.**

**As usual, constructive criticism is accepted. And unless you have a ferociously good reason for a flame, it is strongly recommended that you keep it to yourself.**

**Thanks for reading!**

**Regards,**

**Ice**

**PS: I reached over 4,000 words! Yes!**


	9. Pranks and Obstacles

**Title:** This Just Isn't My Day/Chapter Nine

**By:** Ice-Eagle Y'Siri

**Disclaimer:** Don't own Naruto or the Akatuski or anything associated with Naruto.

**Summary:** Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the heck out of the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

**I forgot to ask earlier, but I need a beta for my Naruto stories. I don't exactly know how to go about getting a beta, but I do need one, so if you'd like to be my beta or if you guys know someone that'd be a good one, I'd love to know. **

**Thanks and enjoy!  
Ice**

* * *

As the week passed and my concussion healed, the stress of having the Akatsuki living with us (My lovely self, Rian, and Cat) was taking its toll. Sure, they were fun/nuts/completely psychotic, but the work we had (I made some of the more tractable ninjas, like Tobi, help out) was a fairly large amount. Getting their clothes (along with ours) cleaned was an adventure in and of itself. Catherine was becoming so overwhelmed that she even drafted me 'n Rian to help.

Even though I was the one who filled the whole first floor with bubbles last time. Knee high.

Ahem.

Anyway.

From the way that Konan and Pein acted, Itachi and Sasori (Pein later assigned him to help) hadn't made any kind of headway for a chance at going back to their dimension. Then again, it'll probably take them a long time to figure how how do jump space-time-stuff-yadda yadda yadda. Hopefully, not too long, though. I didn't want to try to explain to my parents and other friends just what the Akatsuki was doing here.

"Aya! C'mere!"

I rolled my eyes as I departed from cutting up some cheese on the kitchen counter, "Yeah? Where are ya, Cat?"

"Where do you think?!"

Ah. Laundry room. Ooops.

"Coming, coming, no need to be so cranky--"

"--You weren't the one washing clothes for the past day, Aya."

I ducked and caught the (thankfully empty) laundry detergent bottle, "Yeah, I was, and so was Rian. The bleach you've been using for the bloodstains must've--"

Wait. IDEA.

"Aya?"

Oh. My. God.

This was GLORIOUS.

"Aya? You've got that look. What--"

I whirled around and started exiting, "Stay here. I'll be right back. I've got to find Konan."

Catherine--wet laundry in hand--looked baffled, "Sure? Just come back!"

Jogging around the house, I hollered, "Hey, Konan! Where are you?"

I skidded out onto the back porch to see Pein and Konan walking down the steps and into the nearby woods. Farther down the pathway, I could barely see Hidan and Kisame arguing about something, probably ridiculous. I put them out of my mind as the ninja I called for turned.

"Yes, Aya-chan?"

"When're you and Leader coming back?"

The two ninja exchanged expressionless shrugs, "Probably in a couple of hours, Aya-chan."

"Well, I'd like to talk to you when you get back, if you don't mind. I've got an idea."

"Alright. See you in a while, Aya-san."

"Bye Leader-and-Konan!" I chirped as I waved, then power-walked back into the house.

"What whazzat, un?" I giggled, "Nothing, Deidara. Have you seen Rian anywhere? I need to talk to her about something."

The blonde ninja pointed vaguely from his slouch on the couch, "Somewhere upstairs, un."

Being brave, I patted his head before starting to run up the stairs, "Thanks!"

I ignored his yell of indignation, "Hey, I ain't a damn dog, un!"

Climbing up the stairs, I roamed down the hallway and went up another flight of stairs. Rian's door was the first one on the right, while I had the room across from her, and Cat was diagonally across from me. Konan and Pein (presumably) were adjacent to me and the rest of the Akatsuki were on the remainder of the third floor and all of the second floor.

"Reeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaannnnnn!!!"

"Yeah?" the yell came from inside the door, "Ya need me?"

Since her door was open, it was okay to go inside, so I jumped on her bed, "I've got the bestest idea freaking ever, Rian."

My best friend swiveled in her desk chair to face me, "What's up? Who's it this time?"

I huffed, "Silly Rian. Who do you think? Hidan. Duh."

Her eyes widened, "Oh. OH."

"Exactly. C'mon, get offa your Myspace--"

"--Facebook--"

"--and folllow me to the laundry room. Kathleen doesn't know what's going on yet and I promised I'd help with the laundry."

My friend--if an Akatsuki (or heck, any normal person) looked at her--seemed to grin demonically, "Now I'm intrigued."

She turned her computer off and we trooped back down the stairs, passing Tobi and Kakuzu going in the opposite direction. Deidara was sculpting a figure of someone--it looked like himself, go figure--and Sasori/Itachi had retreated to somewhere else in the house. Ninjas are hard to keep track of. We made it past all of them without comment and moved down to the laundry room. Cat, in the meanwhile, had loaded most of the darks into the washer and I waved my hands at her hurriedly.

"Wait! Hidan's aren't in there, are they?"

Catherine looked confused, "No, they're right here. What--"

"We're gonna bleach his clothes. But I need to ask Konan about if there is some kind of color-preserving jutsu on all of his uniforms."

Both of my friends just stared. "Aya," Rian said slowly, "Why would they have that on their clothes? I mean, Hidan would probably WANT all of the blood or whatever to stay on his. C'mon. Freaky psycho here."

I raised an eyebrow, "Ninjas are vain, remember? Recall the whole incident with Itachi's and Deidara's hair."

Catherine and Rian shuddered and Cat said, "I don't _want_ to remember. Ever. That was mentally scarring."

"Have I made my point?" My best friends glared.

Smiling cheerfully, I reached up on the shelf above the washer and dryer and picked up our industrial-strength bleach. Cat found it at some Home-depot-ey store one day, and it was wonderful for certain pranks. Since we couldn't figure a better place to put it, we just kept the stuff in the laundry room where it looked like it belonged.

Rian's eyes widened, "Aya, you're gonna use that? That stuff almost ate through the washer."

"Almost doesn't count. Quite worrying."

"The last time you said that the place was filled with bubbles," Cat grumbled, "And remember how long it took to get them out of the house?"

"Yeah, but you have to admit just how much shinier everything has been since."

"Why did we even let you try doing laundry again?" Rian rolled her eyes.

"Because she did her family's laundry for a couple of years without damaging anything, Cat."

"Oh, yeah."

I shrugged, "So I got a little carried away--"

"--c'mon, sweetie, don't lie."

I mock-glared at the two of them. Giggling, Cat started the dryer and Rian brought our own clothes down. Seeing the almost overflowing amount of clothes in Rian's hamper, I became slightly concerned.

"Jeez, Rian, what the heck--," I looked in her hamper, "Oh, heck no. No. _No way_. Rian, you are cleaning your shoes by yourself. There is _no effing way_ that I'm going to touch these things. What possessed you to get them?"

Rian pouted, "Aw, c'mon, Aya, they're not that bad. You're overreacting."

I motioned Cat over to my side and pointed at the Disgrace Of Rian's Shoes, "Am I overreacting?"

"Yes," she responded, "You are. They're just neon-green-pink-and-orange Cro--" her eyes narrowed, "--You didn't tell me they were Crocs, Rian. These are the ugliest shoes I have _ever_ seen. Ever. That's saying something."

"But they were comfortable! and under $15! And they're washable!" Rian wailed.

I glared, "The color combination I wouldn't have minded if they were on skater shoes or just plain old sneakers. They would've looked fly. But this? Crocs?" I shook my head sadly, "There is cheap shopping and cheap shopping, dear. You've just crossed that line by a lot. We are definitely tossing these in with Hidan's clothes when Konan gets back. Let's get our stuff done so that Hidan doesn't have anything to use for retribution."

"If he could even figure out how to use the machines," Cat pointed out, "Besides, I don't want him to see our underwear, girly and teenager-ly as it sounds."

"You've got a point, although I doubt we have any underwear he hasn't seen somewhere before."

Rian choked, "How--when did you find out that he--"

I gave my best friend a 'come-on,slow person' look, "The man walks around shirtless shamelessly and you think he's a virgin? I mean, gyawd, the ways he was pretending to hit on me was extremely frightening."

"Speaking of hitting on people..." Cat peeked both ways down the hallway, then shut the laundry room door, "Karie called my cell earlier today. She's having a party at her house and she's invited us to come. It's from eight to midnight. She says to bring something, but nothing spiked. Police are running a speed trap on her road tonight and Karie wants everything relatively quiet."

"I love how she put in the word 'relatively'," I noted dryly, "Is there any way we can back out of this gracefully? I mean, it's like a three hour drive there and another one back. Karie's all the way in Tallahassee. We'd get home at some ungodly hour. Are any adult authority 'keep-us-out-of-trouble-figures' going to be there?"

"More importantly, how many people are going to be there?" Rian added.

"Uhm...to the first question, her parents and her boyfriends' parents, and to the second question, the people we hang out with every day at the usual spot at school outside the art room."

I raised an eyebrow, "So like around 30-40 people. I hope to God she's not expecting me to make enough of a dish for that many people."

"Karie thought you might say that and the answer is no."

"Brownie mix, here I come."

"Can I help?" Rian perked up at my mention of brownie mix, but I shot her down with my next comment, "Rian. You. Nearly. Blew. Up. The. Kitchen."

"Did not."

"Did too."

"Did NOT. Besides that was a year ago--"

"--Irrelevant. Oh, yeah--did TOO."

"SHUT UP. BOTH OF YOU," Catherine opened the door leading to the outside world and sneaked a look in the hallway, " Oh, good. No one's in the hallway that I can see. Is the laundry loaded and stuff?"

"Uhm. Yeah."

"Then let's go take a walk or something and decide about this. Don't we need to talk to Konan anyway?"

I laughed a little at the mention of a walk, "I think everyone's doing that today. Hidan-slash-Kisame and Pein-slash-Konan are walking around too, although they're in the woods. Where are we going?"

While we exited the house via the front door, Cat answered quietly, "Just around the streets. Not far."

* * *

**_Cut to Pein and Konan, Konan's POV_**

"What do you think of them, Konan?"

Pein and I had been walking a fifty yards behind Hidan/Kisame and their shouting was proving to be a good sound screen. I ignored their argument and focused on Pein's question. What _did_ I think of our hostesses?

"Well," I began as we ducked a branch, "They're hard to categorize."

"Don't, then. What do you _think_ of them? Are they trustworthy?"

I shrugged. I only knew as much as he did about the three of them. The hostesses' equivalent to the Bingo Book, the Internet, was difficult for us to understand, and Kisame (though it nearly drove him insane to do so) had searched about the girls after they went to sleep and found nothing worth mentioning for any of them. There were no records of them besides what was located in that "demon-spawn excuse of a citizen directory" (said Kisame). So many people called each other different names on this Internet and so many had the same names. These people were either very unoriginal when it came to names or there were many more of these civilians in this world than we had originally thought.

This MySpace was not proving to be useful at all.

I summarized my thoughts with Pein and concluded thoughtfully, "For civilians, they are very brave. I believe that they're trying to keep us as--dreams that came true, to borrow a phrase from Rian. They do not wish for us to be so real as to get emotional when we figure out a way to go home. As to trustworthy, I think that all of them are capable of keeping their mouths shut, and so did you, Pein, since you didn't kill them immediately after we arrived. They're just pranksters. Intelligent pranksters, but pranksters nonetheless."

Pein nodded as we moved farther into the forest. The trees were different here; not like the large Poyaggi trees **(1) **from back home in Amegakure, but small, pale trees. Parts of the ground was damp, even marshlike, and many of the trees that grew in those areas here had their roots visible above the water. Poyaggi trees were more like the ones that Cat called "Live Oak" trees.

"That is what I had concluded as well, Konan."

"We let them live?" I forced the question. If Pein answered it with a yes, then he would stick to his word and see to it that the girls stayed alive for however long we were here. If he didn't answer, then he planned on executing them after all. Pein never broke his spoken word.

"They live."

I relaxed with a spurt of surprise. I didn't even realize that I was nervous about hearing his decision. Pein just raised an eyebrow, "You were actually concerned about what I would say, weren't you?"

I shrugged.

"You care for them, at least a little. Konan, we've only known them for a couple of weeks."

I frowned at Pein. We had stopped at the edge of the forest and faced the beginning of a beach. Hidan and Kisame moved on ahead, still going at maximum vocal capacity. Pein moved to relax against one of the large rocks and I followed, doing the same. Turning my head towards my Leader, I remarked, "I know that, Pein. But they're only civilians and we're S-Class ranked shinobi. We probably know them better than they know themselves. Also, they took us in and are trying to--acclimate?--us to their world. They didn't have to, Pein. They could have accepted us and then fled to gods know where and--with their military technology--would have been able to kill us all."

"Not if we got them first, Konan."

I shook my head, "But that is not the _point_. The point is that even though we are imposing on them and have already injured them, they have accepted it and moved on. They are doing very well for being on their own for the first time. Although," I added dryly, "it probably helps that we supposedly exist here as fiction."

"Yes," Pein replied, just as dryly, "It probably does."

I idly pulled a sheet of purple origami paper out of my pouch and began to fold it into a paper crane as Pein thought. I had hoped that he wouldn't kill the girls. They didn't deserve to die. At least, not for a while.

"Konan."

I looked up at Pein, "Yes?"

My fingers were still folding the crane as he replied, "Itachi and Sasori haven't found a way home yet."

I shrugged, unconcerned, "It's only been a couple of weeks, Pein. Besides, we're welcome to stay with Aya and Catherine and Rian for the summer. At the least, they have only a few months to think of something."

"Konan, Itachi's made new jutsu in less then a week. The longest it ever took for him and Sasori to come up with something--together, anyway--was two and a half weeks."

"But," I pointed out reasonably, "they've never jumped across dimensions and time before, now have they? I realize you are concerned, Pein, but we still have time. You know that as well as I do."

"Yes, but I'm feeling doubtful. What if they don't figure a way back? What if we never get home?" Pein sighed, "Those questions arise in my head a few times a day, at the least. If--"

"--If, if, if," I teased gently, "Pein. Relax for once in your life. We're not in the shinobi world right now. Taking a break isn't going to kill us. The girls aren't going to kill us. As long as neither you or I don't do anything monumentally stupid, the other Akatsuki won't kill us either. Not a lot is going on back home anyway--Sasuke is with Sound now and the Nine-tailed Fox container is on that three-year apprenticeship with Jiraiya-dono. We already have four of the Tailed Beasts **(2)**. We have time."

Pein frowned, "I suppose you are right, for once."

I patted his arm gently and placed the crane in his hand, "For once?"

Pein regarded the crane in his hands thoughfully, "That is all you are getting out of me. I have something else to ask you."

"You know you can ask me anything, Pein, but I may or may not answer."

"I know," Pein looked out at the water broodingly, "Hidan's worrying me."

"I would be worried for a variety of reasons as well, Pein. Please be a little more specific."

Pein and I both chuckled. I fell silent at his reply, however, "Whatever he has planned for Aya concerns me. They way he flirts with her bothers me. I do not want her harmed."

I shook my head, "I do not think he intends to hurt her this once, Pein. The blatant flirting he does I think he actually means. While this is a miracle in and of itself, he will have a hard time with Aya, since she has," Here I frowned thoughtfully, "well, not a _low_ opinion of herself, per se, but she sees herself very realistically."

"You mean..."

Males. I rolled my eyes, "She knows she isn't ugly, but she also knows she isn't the prettiest girl in the world out there. Aya realizes that she isn't the most incredible--in her opinion, mind--woman that Hidan's ever seen. She thinks that Hidan's way out of her league. As a consequence, she's not taking Hidan seriously. I also think this is one of the few times that she's been hit on seriously by someone and doesn't know how to react."

"I concur. What about the other two? Anything going on between them and the other members?"

"No. I think all three of them are trying not to take them seriously because when we leave they want it to be as painless as possible. I think that's also why Rian and Catherine are being so very careful, along with Aya. The other members--I'm not too sure yet. Maybe Deidara and someone. I didn't realize you wanted me to watch them for that reason."

"I don't," Pein traced the edges of the crane with his finger, "I am concerned for their well-being. All of them."

"As am I."

Pein nodded and pushed off the rock. I followed suit and we moved back onto the forest pathway, "Pein?"

"..."

I hesitated, but all this talk of not going back home had shook me a bit, "Together till the end, no matter what, right?"

Pein paused at my words. I stopped a few steps behind him. He held out a hand and I placed mine in his. For a short time, we walked back towards the house that way, then he let go before we could be seen. I smiled a little. He had put the crane in his collar.

I took that as a yes.

* * *

**So! I haven't updated in forever!**

**But the dreaded things that begin with an E and end with an S and are E---S are a PAIN. I had been worrying about them and preparing for them for months (literally). **

**So, as a result, I was either too tired/brain dead/time-deficient to write. So I apologize. My bad. Since I have the whole summer now, I'll be able to write more. **

**Oh, yes. I can see you all just jumping in joy after that announcement. **

**1. Poyaggi trees are not real. I borrowed the name from a computer game I played.**

**2. I don't actually know how many of the Tailed Beasts the Akatsuki have at that point in the timeline. I forget. Don't bash me if the number's wrong. Just correct me through a review and I'll fix it.**

**How did I do with Konan and Pein? I HAD SUCH A FREAKING HARD TIME. They're so stoic half the time, and the other half of the time we don't know what they're like when they're by themselves. I hope I passed muster.**

**Heck, I hope I passed, period.**

**Please review, review, review, and no flames allowed.**

**Thanks,**

**Ice**


	10. Parties and Fire

**Title:** This Just Isn't My Day/Chapter Nine

**By:** Ice-Eagle Y'Siri

**Disclaimer:** Don't own Naruto or the Akatuski or anything associated with Naruto.

**Summary:** Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the heck out of the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

* * *

_**Aya's POV**_

"So we're going?"

I sighed, "I suppose. You're sure--"

"No, we can't say you're sick, or injured, or on a date, etc, etc, etc. Karie sounded suspicious over the phone when I talked to her--she even remembered how you had that 'whatever-it-was' surgery I couldn't even pronounce to get us out of the last shebang she was throwing and asked about it."

I gaped as the three of us made our way back up the driveway, "Oh, my God. She actually remembered?"

"Down to the time on surgery day and estimated recovery rate."

"Holy shit."

"You're telling me. If it wasn't for the fact that she's dating Mike's older brother, I'd be a little concerned about her fixation with you," Catherine opened the front door and the three of us made our way back into the laundry room, "You know how she swings between being straight and bisexual."

"Now, now, she doesn't swing that much--"

Rian just gave me a look, "Dear, she's a straight as a wet noodle."

I burst out laughing as we changed the darks and put our (as in mine, Rian's, and Cat's clothes) into the dryer. All of us jumped and nearly shrieked when we heard a--

"--You wanted to talk to me, Aya-chan?"

"JESUS CHRIST!" Rian jumped and bumped into Catherine, who fell onto me, and then I somehow in some way managed to snag Rian's pants and we all landed in some large unidentifiable mound of arms and legs.

"You know," Konan said wryly from upside down on the ceiling, "The way you three get in pileups is...dare I say it? Nearly suspicious."

The three of us finally got ourselves sorted out and while Cat loaded the new clothes (including Rian's shoes, indicating that this was the bleach load; Konan said it was okay to bleach Hidan's clothes) I shut and locked the door while Rian perched herself on top of the dryer. She sat cross-legged so that her feet didn't get in Catherine's way and smirked, "What, do you think we try to get like this on purpose or something?"

"Maybe, Rian-chan. I don't know you all that well."

"Well," my best friend announced, "We have got to fix that. You wanna come with us to this party thing that a sort-of friend of ours is throwing?"

Konan hesitated from her spot on the ceiling, "I am surprised that you asked me. If I may inquire as to why you would like me to attend?"

Rian ticked off the reasons on her fingers, "Well, one, I wanna get to know you better. Lord knows how long you people are here and you guys are famous to people all over the world. The chance to be friends with you is awesome. Secondly, you're most trusted by Leader and obviously he'll believe what you say, unlike Kakuzu or, God forbid, Hidan. Three, we might as be watched over anyway, and who would be better at that than you?"

The blue-haired ninja frowned in thought, "You all are much more intelligent than you seem."

I gasped, "My God, Rian, you'll actually make her think we're, like, _smart_. Don't _do _that!"

"The sarcasm you put in that statement is amazing, Aya," snarked Cat as she contemplated one of her shoes, "You really have a gift."

I simpered, "Why, thank you, just ever so much!"

"You can stop now."

"But--ow!"

I should've known better to think that Cat would just take off her shoe just to look at it. Stupid me.

"When is this party, Aya-san?"

I blinked at the sudden question but soon recovered, "Um. It starts at eight, but we should leave for it around six if we want to get there when it starts. That gives us until ten and then we can be back around twelve thirty to one in the morning. I'm designated driver, since I hate drinking."

"Who says there'll be alcohol?"

I just looked at Cat, "Do you honestly think that there won't be anything there? Or anything spiked? Karie may not want anything alcohol related brought, but someone will undoubtedly bring something just to piss her off."

"Good point."

I stood and checked my watch. I did a double take when I realized it was six o'clock, "Guys. It's six. We'd better start getting ready and getting food ready for the others so that they won't starve when we leave."

"Not to mention," Rian pointed out greedily, "You need to make your badass brownies. Make another batch just for me."

"Your pigginess knows no bounds, my dear."

"I learned from the best," Rian smiled sweetly and Catherine laughed. Wow. My friends are learning.

Oh, boy.

I'm still deciding between scared and 'YES! AWESOME!'

* * *

An hour and a half-ish later...

_**BAKING AND/OR COOKING IS NOT FOR PEOPLE WHO BURN THINGS FOR A LIVING.**_

_**THIS INCLUDES YOU, DEIDARA.**_

I grinned as I looked up at the sign that hung on the archway to the kitchen. Hah.

"What the heck? I don't even like cooking, un."

I waved a hand at the blonde ninja as I walked toward the stove, "I don't care, Deidara. You're still staying out while I'm making your supper. Do you want your food burned?"

He sulked from the archway as Cat chortled, "No."

"Then don't screw with the cook--Ow! Dangit, Rian, fine, chefs," I rolled my eyes, "Yeesh."

"That is such an innuendo, un. You're lucky I'm of a more virtuous nature."

Rian was working on the dirty dishes and putting away ingredients (both brownie and lasagna) as Cat pulled out the brownies and slid the lasagna inside the stove. I, in the meanwhile, was checking with a thermometer to see that my party dish was fully cooked. I didn't want anyone getting sick.

"I'm surprised you even know what that means, Deidara-baka."

"Hey!"

I smirked and greeted cheerfully, "Hey, Sasori! How are the things with the transportation jutsu going?"

I covered the brownie pans and slit a hole into each corner of the foil so that my dessert could cool. I absent-mindedly tapped Rian's fingers away from my food as I waited for his reply. When he didn't answer, I looked up,"Well?"

He stared.

I glared.

"C'mon, dude," Cat said with a sigh, "You can't win. Just tell us already or I'll get Itachi to tell us."

Rian looked perplexed, "How? Your feminine wiles?"

She just smiled mysteriously and Rian blanched, "You know what? I don't even want to know. Keep that to yourself, thank you."

"May I sit?"

I gestured to the one of the bar seats that overlooked the kitchen, "Sure. Now what's up?"

The red-haired ninja took a seat and replied, "Itachi-san and I are running into--a few difficulties. However, both of us believe we'll have something to take us all back by the end of your summer."

We just gaped and Rian answered for us all, "But that's two months from now."

I muttered, "Thanks, Captain Obvious."

"Shut up."

"It is," Sasori shifted his gaze between the three of us.

I shrugged, "Okay. Well, if there's anything we can do to help, just let us know. However, myself, Rian, Cat, and Konan will be attending a party and we won't be back until very early tomorrow morning."

"You make it sound as if you don't want to go, un."

The oven beeped. I sniffed at Deidara as I portioned the lasagna into equal amounts for all concerned. Seeing yet another set of fingers trying to taste my food, I sighed and whacked the offending appendages.

Very, very, hard.

"What the fuck, woman?! Seriously, first you bleach my damn clothes and now you're beating me all over the Jashin-forsaken place?! What the hell!!"

Ignoring Hidan's outburst for the moment, I told Deidara, "Yeah--I don't particularly want to go--Karie is the friend that nobody really likes, but you keep around for the sake of amusement. She's not that bad, but she is a pain in the butt."

"Aya!" I blithely ignored Cat's half-serious exclamation and turned to Hidan, "As for _you_--"

"You're holding my hands."

I overrode his statement, "--it makes sure you pay attention. You painted on my ceiling. I bleached your clothes. I think we're even."

"I don't, dammit," Hidan said crankily, "Seriously, you keep abusing me."

I snorted a laugh as I let him go and stepped back, "Only when you're being a moron."

"Which is all the time," Rian muttered and Hidan shot her a _look_. My partner in crime shrugged, "What? It's true. Your partner would agree with me."

Hidan turned his head to Deidara as Sasori looked on with amusement, "You can see how much she loves me, man. Fucking feisty," He gave me a suggestive look, "I like that in a woman."

I shook my head, "Not feisty, just vengeful."

"Whatever it is--" Hidan mock-leered (I think, anyway), "--I like it."

My eyes rolled back so far I nearly fell, "Oh, God. Save me."

The Jashinist smirked, "Seriously, you _know _you like it. And Rian, my partner--"

"--Would like for you to shut up. Now."

I contemplated banging my head on the counter. Something must've shown on my face, because Kakuzu (who was drawn [not attracted, Kakuzu would rather drop dead than admit to such a thing] to Hidan takedowns like Deidara to fire) said dryly, "I'm sorry, Aya-san. I've tried to teach him to be subtle, but it hasn't seemed to take."

"What's the difference between being subtle and being a ninja, for Jashin's sake?"

"Virtually nothing," Sasori looked bored, "Except you kill people when you're being a ninja and subtlety is integral in that profession."

Good Lord. I threw my hands up in the air, "Fine. Whatever. I give up. I don't care at the moment whether or not Hidan is subtle. We have a," I checked my watch, "half-hour to get ready to go to this party thing. Shoo!"

"Can Tobi come?"

"By all the gods, take him, un. He's driving me insane."

I jumped about a foot in the air and would've fallen if Rian hadn't steadied me, "Tobi, where are you?"

"Look up, silly Aya-chan."

I craned my head back and there was Tobi sitting cross-legged on the ceiling. He must've snuck in during my argument with Hidan. Cat, in the meanwhile, had taken a seat next to Sasori. Now she remarked, "Christ, this is turning into a T.V. show. Rian, Aya, we need to go get ready c'mon."

"But can Tobi--"

The masked ninja shut up as Catherine held up a hand, "--Ask Konan. Not us. Bye."

* * *

_**Nearly a half-hour later--Aya's POV**_

I knocked on Rian's door, "C'mon, girl! We need to go sometime this year."

"Gimme a minute!"

I pursed my lips and settled against the wall opposite her door. I wore jean shorts (not short shorts, but a good six or seven inches above my knees) along with a babydoll blue and white floral tanktop. I wore natural eye makeup and put my hair half up in a bun.

"You look pretty!"

"Thanks! So do you!" I returned Cat's one-armed hug and she banged on the door, "Hurry UP!"

"I'm coming! Jeez!"

Cat wore black capris and an aqua halter shirt while Rian was the only one in jeans and a clingy black tanktop. All of us wore flip-flops and my best friends also wore makeup.

"We ready?"

Rian nodded her head, "Yeah. Konan's meeting us outside."

"Okay, then. Cat, I want you to assist in carrying the food."

"Why can't I help?" Rian whined and I smirked as we made our way down.

I carefully gave Cat the tray of brownies as I replied, "Because you'll eat them all."

"Will not," Rian scoffed, "I can't help it if your brownies are the next most addictive thing to crack, you know."

I opened my mouth, then shut it again. My God, the temptation to say something was very strong.

"Shut it, Aya."

I tried to protest, "But I--"

Rian cut me off as we loaded the car with food for the trip and pillows to sleep on on the way back, "I know that look, Aya, and I _know _you're about to snark something, so hush."

I sent a miffed look to Konan (she had been leaning against the van) who smiled faintly.

"My best friends," I announced to the general airspace, "Know me far too well."

"Tobi's coming! Tobi's coming!"

"Yay!" squealed Catherine.

As I looked on with amusement, Cat glomped Tobi and dragged him over to the van and got him strapped in the back seat. Konan clambered inside beside him and Cat moved into one of the middle row seats while Rian claimed shotgun. I peered inside Rian's window and asked, "You guys need any last-minute things before we go?"

Rian smacked her forehead, "Aya, could you get my sunglasses? I left them on the counter in the kitchen."

"Sure. I'll be right back."

I let myself back in the door I just locked and moved to get my best friend's sunglasses when there was a chorus of wolf-whistles. Ignoring them, I wiggled my fingers goodbye at the remaining Akatsuki members as I snagged the needed sunglasses. Then I began to sail back out the door.

Note the word 'began'.

"Damn, Aya, no kiss goodbye? Seriously?"

I raised an eyebrow at the somewhat bane of my existence, "Hidan you think you're funny, but no way. I'll give you a hug because you look so pathetic asking for something--" and I proceeded to do so before continuing, "--but now I need to go. Goodbye, gentlemen, and don't destroy everything while we're gone."

"What happens if we do, un?"

I leaned against the doorway and smirked evilly, "Oh, it won't be me that'll have your heads. _Cat _will."

And with those words, I finally exited the house to a triumphant, "That's my girl! Damn!"

I would rather drop dead than admit it, I thought to myself, but Hidan was very huggable.

* * *

**_Arrival at house, Aya's POV_**

I pulled up in front of Karie's house and proceeded up the driveway; Konan was still arguing with Rian.

"I still believe that Deadpool is stronger than Bumblebee--" (We watched X-Men Origins and Transformers about a week-and-a-half ago)

"--But Bumblebee could step on him and he'd be squished like a bug! C'mon--"

"--Deadpool can slice through metal and would cut your yellow Autobot to bits."

Tobi and I exchanged amused looks and I called out to Konan, "Genjutsu, you two. Don't forget."

"Aya--" Konan's voice sounded long-suffering, "We know. Remember who you're talking to. And Rian and I were wondering who is superior--Bumblebee or Deadpool?"

"Neither," Cat handed me one of the brownie platters, "Chuck Norris with a BB gun screws them both."

I laughed and high-fived Catherine as both Konan and Rian groaned. Stopping suddenly, Tobi announced, "Tobi wants to be called Tony. Konan should be called Katelyn."

"I know too many people that begin with a 'C' or a 'K'," I muttered, "But okay. You guys are friends we met while we were walkking on the beach one day and we decided to bring you two to get to know y'all better. We agreed?"

The assembled company nodded and we knocked on the front door, Rian in front. When a blond-haired girl with a goofy smile answered the door, I stifled the urge to groan, then pasted a smile on my face.

"Hi guys! What took you so long? When I went to Gainesville, it only took me a little less than an hour and a half."

"Speeding," Cat murmured.

I shot her what I hoped was a slightly admonishing look before stepping forward, "Hey, Karie. You said we could bring guests and we took you at your word. Katelyn and Tony, this is Karie Summers. She's a friend of ours from school."

Karie shook their hands as we stepped inside. I looked around with amusement; orange and purple and yellow decorations were hung all over the place and "Let it Rock" (Kevin Rudolf) was blaring in the background. The guests looked toward the open door and yelled greetings. Rian cheerfully replied to the hellos and disappeared in the crowd, leaving Cat and I (with Tobi and Konan following like baby ducks) to wander off to the kitchen to set our food down.

"I am totally loving the decorations, Karie. The color scheme--" I looked for a tactful way to say that it was downright ugly but Karie beat me to the punch, "--I know it's ugly. However, I had no choice. Taylor pounced as soon as she arrived--early, of course--and took over. I know I irritate y'all to no end, but good _God _that woman drives me crazy."

I blinked, "You know you annoy us and you do it anyway."

"Keeps you three on your toes," Karie winked at us and when she turned, Cat elbowed me and whispered, "Told you."

"Shut up."

"What?"

I shook my head in the negative, "Not you. What time did that--succubus--stop laughing, Cat, you know she is one--get here?"

"You know how I said the party started at eight?"

I answered warily, "Yeah...."

Karie frowned ferociously as she opened a drawer in the fridge and got a Coke for Cat and a bottled (and still sealed; no drugs here) for me, "She got here at four. What. The. Hell."

I gaped, "So why didn't you kick her out?"

I uncovered the brownies and in a flash Rian was at the counter with a plate handy, "I swear, girl, the way you know when I open the foil--"

"--I couldn't without alerting the police down the street; Taylor would've left kicking and screaming--hey, you brought your brownies?"

Rian grinned at me as three of my brownies suddenly vanished, "I got Crack Brownie Sense. It comes with being your best friend and watching you make them."

I raised an eyebrow as another one disappeared, "You've got to be kidding me. And yes, I've got my brownies. Save a few for me; we've got a long drive back."

"Alright."

I winced as I heard, "Aya! You're here! Who are your new friends?"

The---ah, voluptuous--short blond girl that called me gave me a hug (which I half-heartedly returned, but she didn't notice) with her new boy toy in tow. Mildly attractive (Now that I've seen Hidan in the flesh, no one else really compares), the tall brown-haired boy offered me his hand, "Derrick. Nice to meet you."

I shook it with a slight grimace and he grinned, "Aya. Same--but I wish it weren't under these circumstances."

Derrick rolled his eyes as Taylor began talking with Konan and Cat; she was eyeing Tobi, "I know. She's a good lay, though, so I figured I should come to this party and see if I could get anything out of it from her."

I raised an eyebrow, "If that weren't so blatantly true I would've punched you. As it is, Taylor deserves what's coming to her, most of the time," I narrowed my eyes at him, "I hope you're not expecting the rest of us to act like she does."

"Trust me, I'm not crazy. Of course not. If I dated you, which I'm not particularly attracted to you, no offense--"

"None taken."

"--I wouldn't expect you to cheat on me like she does. I've caught her twice and the make-up sex was--"

I raised a hand and he laughed, "Okay, way too much detail there, buddy. Stop."

"Sorry. Anyway, you seem nice enough, but we might want to rescue your guy friend-?" Derrick's voice was questioning and I answered, "Tony."

"--Yeah. Tony. My ever-straying girl is latched onto him and I'm afraid for her safety."

I looked towards my shinobi friends and sure enough, there was Tobi with Taylor gripping his arm. With a sigh, I pulled Derrick over and unhinged his fickle girlfriend from Tobi, "You've got your own boyfriend, sweetie. Hang onto him instead."

The succubus blinked at me, "Oh. Sorry."

"It's cool. Just watch it. If you're going to cheat on your boyfriend, at least have the sense to be discreet about it."

Karie leaned over and whispered in my ear, "I don't think half of what you just said is in her vocabulary."

"What?" Taylor looked confused and Konan snorted while Cat laughed. Derrick just sighed and wrapped an arm around his girlfriend's waist, "Don't worry about it, babe. C'mon. Let's go dance. Y'all are welcome to join us if you like."

I smiled politely, "Maybe later, Derrick. We've got to say hello to everyone else first."

He nodded, "Alright. The invitation is still open for you guys, though. Just let me know and we'll be out there with you."

He and his girlfriend (AKA slut, but let's be charitable for a while longer) disappeared into the dancing crowd and I turned when I heard a soft keening noise. Karie and Cat were looking at Tobi with concern while Konan had placed a hand on his shoulder.

Tobi had crossed his arms over himself, "She wouldn't stop touching me! Her--chest--" he said with a shudder, "--kept rubbing--" Tobi seemed lost for words.

Under other circumstances, this would've been hysterical.

Oh, what the heck. This is hilarious.

Containing myself except for a grin, I and Rian wrapped an arm around his shoulders as we reassured him.

"Don't worry, man," Rian said soothingly, "She'll leave you alone now. If she doesn't, well--"

I frowned at my best friend, "Rian. You are _not _lighting her hair on fire."

She gave me her puppy dog eyes and I sighed as I leaned against Tobi, "Fine. Just tell me first and Cat will get the hairspray."

Rian beamed as Karie gaped at the two of us, "Are you _serious_?"

I shrugged, "Sure. Why not? Besides, it's not like your pool isn't open. I saw people swimming in it earlier. We'll be sure to have a bucket of water ready or someone to push her in. If that Derrick dude really is nice, he'll fish her out as soon as she's doused. Besides, she's got a lot of hair--I doubt she'll burn herself badly, if at all."

Karie was still gaping and I looked at her concernedly, "What?"

"Isn't that--I don't' know--illegal?"

Cat shrugged, "Like we've gotten caught before. Besides, you know she deserves it. She can't go around tossing boys left and right after she's done playing with him. It's not right, and it's not like her hair won't grow back. The speed when it regrew after we buzzed it once was positively unnatural."

"Point."

"But," I added with a stern look at my fellow conspirators, "We need to do it towards the end of the party when we're ready to leave. Even if we do it outside, chances are the police will hear the noise and come see what the problem is. For now, let's make nice and quietly let select people know what's going on so we have a fast getaway if we need it."

My friends saluted, "Yes, ma'am."

I turned to Tobi and Konan, "You guys want me to find a corner for you to hide in?"

Konan shrugged and Tobi didn't make a sound. Karie stepped up to my side and said, "I'll find them some place, Aya. I wouldn't mind keeping them company, if it's okay with you. Besides, you and your fellow partners in crime will draw a lot of people to you, so if they want to go unnoticed, you can't hang around them."

I looked penetratingly into Karie's eyes. She looked back at me just as seriously. I nodded and said quietly, "Text me if something's wrong, you three. I'll have my phone on vibrate; the music is so loud I won't hear a thing if I had it set to ring."

Konan answered for the trio, "Okay."

I smiled brightly, "Well, let's get this show on the road! Karie, I'm assuming we can use your hairspray in the bathroom--"

"--sure--"

"--And Rian has a lighter in her clutch, so we're all set. Let's get this started."

* * *

_**Two hours later, Aya's POV**_

Rian, Cat, and I had said our hellos to everyone that was here and we informed select groups of people just what was going on. After we danced for an hour or so on the floor with Derrick/Succubus and ate some of the delicious foods that were brought by other guests, we all began to move outside onto the deck and into the yard. The night was cool for a summer evening, and dry, since it hadn't rained for a few days. The only problem was the bugs, but with so may people outside, there was more than enough different blood for all the insects.

"Hey, Taylor, lemme see your back; I've got some bug spray and we all know how you react to bug bites," Taylor smiled at Cat as I tugged her closer to one of the lamps (the better to see her with, my dear_--shut up shut up_) and, consequently, nearer to the pool.

"Thanks!"

Taylor turned her back and I pulled Derrick into position by the water's edge--he had taken off his shirt and was being sprayed by Karie, who had actual bug spray, unlike Cat. Rian drifted around with her lighter concealed in her hand, until I stuck my foot out. When I bent down to catch her, Rian had accidentally flicked the switch on her lighter, causing it to ignite.

Which, of course, expanded upon reaching the hairspray gas, causing Taylor's blond, hip-length braided hair to ignite.

Very, very, quickly.

_**"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"**_

My eyes widened, "Rian, what did you do?"

My best friend winked and I grinned back, "It was an accident!"

Shouts of "Oh, shit!" and "God, someone get her in the water!" reached my ears and Karie, with only the best intentions, of course, yanked the scared-out-of-her-mind-Taylor and shoved her into the pool, where her burning hair was put out immediately.

"I'm on fire! I'm on fire!"

Derrick jumped in the water and swam towards her, holding her up, "No babe," he said over the ruckus, "You're just fine. See, some of it's burned, but you're not hurt."

Taylor sniffled and more party guests jumped in the pool, regardless of clothes or swimsuit, "You're sure?"

"I'm sure," her boyfriend smiled softly at her, "C'mon, Tay, let's get you out of here and dried off. I'm sure Karie's mom or Aya can cut your hair for you."

While the two of them were climbing out, I turned to Cat and mouthed, 'Tay'? Cat just shook her head and grinned. She leaned over and whispered to me, "I guess he likes her more than he lets on."

I frowned thoughtfully, "I suppose," I ignored the small twinge of disappointment as I smiled at Karie, Cat, and Rian, "But good job, you guys. No one's calling 911, are they?"

Karie shook her head in the negative, "Nope, not that I heard or saw. But I gotta go help Taylor and Derrick find my mom. You guys are going now?"

I looked at my best friends for their opinion, and Rian answered the question, "I suppose, unless Katelyn and To-Tony wants to stay."

I winced slightly and prayed that Karie didn't pick up the minor slip on Rian's part, "I somehow doubt it on Tony's part. Let's go ask."

"Well, it was nice to see you guys. Nice prank and all--everything's more fun when you three are around."

I smiled genuinely at Karie Summers as we made our way back inside. Rian and Cat immediately made their way back to our ninja friends on the couch, but I held onto Karie's arm as I said, "Thanks, Karie, for going along with it. Your parties are always fun. I hope Mike's doing okay--you guys still going strong?"

Her face lit up, "Yeah, we're doing great! He's been more understanding lately and we've been getting closer--he's really sweet!"

I kept my slight revulsion at the almost-overwhelming cuteness inside and nodded my head, "Well, that's good to hear."

"Can we go home now? I'm really tired and everything," Konan made our way over to us and I replied, "Sure. I think we need to anyway, since we've got a pretty long drive back."

"Aren't you and Rian switching?"

"Yeah, but you never know--I'm more of a night person than she is. Anyway, thanks for having us, Karie," I gave her a hug.

"Of course. Thanks for coming, even if Tony had a slightly traumatizing experience!"

We all laughed at that and I suddenly felt a hand on my shoulder, "Leaving without saying goodbye, Aya?"

I turned to see Derrick--no girlfriend in sight--standing behind me. I put a hand on my hips and just stared, "Never. See you, Derrick."

"Do you have my phone number so you can text me?"

He gave me his number and all of us a hug and disappeared back into the crowd. Rian, Cat, and Karie stared at me as we moved toward the entrance of the house, "What was that?"

I shrugged, "He's only being nice. Derrick really does like Taylor, though I don't know what he sees in her. And I'm not interested, you guys. Stand down."

Cat grinned wickedly as we made our way to the car, "If you say so."

I rolled my eyes, "Of course I do. Hidan's better at hugs, anyway."

"_Really_."

"Shut it, Rian."

"Tobi senses something going on here," the masked ninja said as we entered the car. Our seating arrangements were similar, except for the fact that I switched to shotgun and Rian was driving.

"Let's not even go there, y'all. Not tonight."

"SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO," Cat happily overrode whatever the ninjas were going to say as we pulled out of the driveway, "Yoda or Chuck Norris?"

"Yoda, dude. Lightsaber-crazy green mad Jedi. DUH."

I leaned my head against the window as we rolled down the street and shut my eyes. Here we go again.

* * *

_**Arrival at the house, Aya's POV**_

"WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE'RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEE HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!"

I snapped crankily as we banged open the front door, "Could you say that any louder, Rian? I'm pretty sure everyone back in Tally didn't hear you."

"You get so sarcastic when you're sleepy, it's cute."

I dropped the food goods that we didn't eat all the way back into the pantry, "Wow, Hidan, not a single cuss word in that whole sentence. We must be rubbing off on you."

"She's just tired," Rian said in a stage whisper, "Just ignore her and let her go to bed."

"Only if she's joining me."

Silence.

"SAY WHAT?"

"WHAT THE HELL?"

"HIDAN, UN, YOU ARE NOT TAKING ADVANTAGE OF--"

The Jashinist put his hands in the air in surrender, "Fine, fine. Seriously, not need to make such a helluva fuss. Damn!"

"Guys," I rubbed my eyes, "It's like, one in the morning. Can we please go to sleep and save the interrogations for later? Oh," I turned to Deidara, "You'll be pleased to hear that we set a succubus's hair on fire."

"We?"

I huffed, "Fine. I masterminded and Rian and Cat did the actual deed. Yeesh. Konan and Tobi were watching from the sidelines."

Deidara stared at the three of us as we set about putting food and various road-trip items away, "I'm proud of you guys, un. What happened next?"

"Well, in the name of safety, Karie shoved her in the pool."

Hidan and Deidara burst out laughing and I smirked. I had to admit, we did do a pretty good job. Itachi appeared on the stairs and the ninjas promptly shut up, "Please be silent. Sasori and I have been working for the past six hours since you all have left the house and we need the sleep. So do you civilians. Go to bed before Kakuzu gets up and tries to kill you all for interrupting his slumber."

Meekly, we went and did what we were told. Before I slid into my room, Hidan turned me back around, looking hopeful, "Can I have another damn hug?"

I stared at him and he huffed, "Promise I won't do anything."

I shrugged, "Fine."

I gave him a quick hug and tried to pull away, but he wouldn't let go, "Hidan, let go of me. I want to sleep."

"Relax and give me a real hug, dammit."

With a sigh, I did as he told and relaxed, then really hugged him. Sheesh. It makes me wonder why he's become so very clingy. After a minute or two, I pulled away and this time he let me. I ducked my head, "Good night, Hidan."

"'Night, Aya," His voice was so soft I nearly missed it as I shut the door.

I went to sleep that night wondering just what was going on with him.

_Maybe some Nargles crept into his head last night--oh, Lord, I'm starting to sound like Luna._

* * *

**Hi! I've updated! **

**I love this story. I really, really do. It's easier to write with every chapter that I do. Am I moving too fast with the interactions between the ninjas and the main characters? Tell me what you think.**

**I will update in a bit--I've neglected some of my other stories for too long, so I hope this will hold you guys for a while.**

**I'm so proud of myself! Over six thousand words! YES!**

**Don't forget to review!  
**

**Regards,**

**Ice  
**


	11. Dark Hallways and Milkshake Machines

**Title:** This Just Isn't My Day/Chapter Ten

**By:** Ice-Eagle Y'Siri

**Disclaimer:** Don't own Naruto or the Akatuski or anything associated with Naruto. Or the song that I borrowed four lines from, "Free to Be Me" by Francesca Battistelli.

**Summary:** Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the heck out of the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

_**I'm so sorry for not updating! I know I suck.**_

_**God, writing a billion stories at once is hard. **_

_**But that's no excuse. I promise I will write more. PROMISE!!**_

_**And update in real-time, not Ice-time.**_

_**And the play is going to take place in Gainesville, since I don't want to write about every time they drove three hours to Tally (that's where the school is; I'll think of some reason why it has to be in Gatorville, don't worry) and back. Or something.**_

_**Note: This chapter is more serious towards the end--this story isn't going to be all comedy, y'all. Otherwise, there wouldn't be enough of a backstory. Or plot.  
**_

_**And this is probably the most random chapter I've ever written. I have no clue what I was planning to go with this one.**_

_**And now I'm shutting up. :P  
**_

_**Enjoy!

* * *

**_

As the day of Cat's musical came closer and closer and she spent more and more time at various rehearsals, Rian and I enjoyed the ninja's company. Of course, one ninja (usually Konan or Pein; we wouldn't want Deidara anywhere near the wood props) would go with Cat to make sure that she would stay out of trouble. Not that we weren't reliable, because we were, but for the simple fact that we were all occasionally clumsy. And that, in an extremely fire-prone environment, was dangerous. Paper and wood props and backdrops were everywhere in our old-fashioned theater.

Let's not even get started on the _Ü__ber-flammable_ costumes.

However, some of us were more clumsy than others *cough* Cat *cough*.

But I didn't just say that.

Moving on. . .

Cat had dragged Rian and I to rehearsal today (we got here at around five o' clock in the evening); we were currently chilling outside the entrance of the theater with Konan and Sasori. Sasori was here because the rest of us (note: _rest of us, not Sasori himself_) figured he was going to snap if he stayed in the house any longer, unlike Itachi, who was already what us common people would label "Insane".

"Cause I've got a couple of dents in my fender, got a couple of rips in my jeans," I sang maniacally in Rian's ear, laughing, "Try to fit the pieces together, but perfection is my enemy--ow! What was that for? That song is badass!"

I rubbed my head crankily and glared at Rian, who snickered and put her flip flop back on her foot, "It is a good song, sweetie, but not when you're purposely butchering it."

"Uh, sorry that you can't appreciate my squeaky creaky singing prowess."

"I guess," Rian said dryly, "I'll just have to be deprived of such understanding until you feel like singing like a human instead of breaking the sound barrier."

I grinned and chuckled, glancing at Sasori out of the corner of my eye, "If I didn't know better, I could've sworn that you were taking lessons in sarcasm from one of our shinobi friends."

"Why would I need to take lessons? I'm American, remember?"

"Point."

"Aya-san, when will Cat be finished with this," Sasori's voice was monotone from his perch on the ceiling, "rehearsal?"

I shrugged at him and lay down on one of the benches near the doorway and looked up at him, "God, I don't know. Didn't we just get here like an hour ago? It'll be a while. And," I said pointedly, "It's not you're expected to stay here. We couldn't care less if you wandered around the city and came back in a few hours. Just be civvie-like. Right, Konan?"

"She has a point," the paper ninja said slowly from her position against one of the pillars, "If you're too bored, Sasori, feel free to go and scout."

"Which gives me an idea," Rian pulled me up from my admittedly uncomfortable bench, "Let's go explore the school, starting with the theater. And before you object, mother," I closed my mouth with a frown, "We both have our cell-phones. Cat can call us if something comes up. Pein is with her and Konan is with us, so it's not like we're gonna die if some gang jumps us when we're exploring a closet."

I tilted my head as we entered the theater building, Konan a silent shadow behind me, Rian in the lead, "Why would we be exploring a closet?"

"We're in a school. What else would we look at besides the classrooms?," I exchanged a wordless look with Konan, who shrugged, ". . .oohh--kay?"

"Besides, classrooms are boring. Let's go."

"Not to like, burst your bubble, Rian dear, but a school is made up classrooms, or did summer break make you forget?"

Rian huffed as we moved around a corner, "Oh, shut up."

"I'd rather not. You'd miss my chatter to distract us from the absolute creepiness of this hallway," I eyed the shadows warily. The corridor that we were in was completely dark; the lights were off and the blinds were down on all the windows, only leaving a thin line of light shining directly opposite them on the top of the other wall.

And it was quiet as stone.

"Like a tomb," Rian whispered and I brightened and said cheerfully as we opened a classroom door, "Can't you see some crazy axe murderer coming after us and jumping us or something?"

My best friend groaned, "Thanks for the image, Aya. Seriously. Now I'm really glad Konan's with us."

"You can say that again," we moved out of the classroom and back into the hallway and my phone vibrated. Frowning thoughtfully as I stepped out of the doorway for Konan to get out of the room, I opened my phone to see a text from a number I didn't recognize:

_Hi, prey._

I raised an eyebrow and showed the text to Rian, who shrugged, and Konan just sighed, "There's no one here. I scanned the area and there is no one living here besides us."

Shrugging, I texted back: **_Do I know you?_**

_Yes, you do._

As we turned left down a hallway (Konan was keeping track of the turns), I replied: _**Okay, then. Are you a sociopathic murderer who's lurking in a dark hallway with an axe?**_

_No._

Another text from the number popped up before I could reply to the first one:

_But I am going to kill you._

I rolled my eyes, "Rian, we've got a psychopathic murderer somewhere who wants to kill us. Shall we run?"

My friend looked nonplussed, "Why don't you just call him?"

"Why are you assuming it's a he? It could be a she, you sexist pig."

"I am not a pig."

"Are too."

"Quit stalling and hurry up and call the twit already before I do."

I thrust the phone at her, "Then go ahead."

Rian batted the phone away and just gave me the Stare. Rolling my eyes again, I sighed and dialed the number and waited impatiently for the whoever it was to pick it up on the other end. In the meanwhile, Rian had opened doors to other classrooms, shut them, and was banging on the floor-to-ceiling lockers, blithely ignoring my and Konan's "shush"es and "shut up"s. Finally, someone at the other end answered.

"Hello, Aya," I brightened at the voice, "Derrick! Hi! What's up?"

"I'm going to kill you," my eyebrows took a nosedive and I put changed the setting to speaker, ". . .why are you going to kill me?"

"Because," Derrick's voice echoed eerily down the hallway, "Taylor's hair isn't growing back. And it's your fault."

I just gaped at the phone.

What the hell?

Rian burst out laughing and Konan unbent enough to chuckle, "How is it my fault? Didn't we agree that she deserved it?"

"So much for your psychotic murderer idea," Rian chortled and I waved a hand impatiently at her as Derrick answered me, "Yes. But it's been over two weeks and Taylor's hair isn't growing back at all and she's having a nervous breakdown and no she doesn't know it's ya'll I'm talking out of earshot--"

I frowned and interrupted, "Wait. I thought only the edges of her hair were burned."

There was silence on the other line.

I said warningly, "Derrick--"

"Fine, fine. For some reason Karie's hairspray didn't wash out in the water and somehow bonded with the chlorine, I guess, and became super-flammable," Derrick paused, then went on, "And then someone waved a lighter near her hair again as a joke and a few strands got too close so . . ." his voice trailed off.

I exchanged looks with my companions, "Oh, my."

"Indeed. And," Derrick said with a relish, "This was after Karie had trimmed her hair the first time."

Ooops.

"Jesus. Is she okay? She's not burned, is she?"

"No, just more, ah, bald than before," Derrick laughed, "I do suggest not coming back here for a while until things settle down some."

"We're so sorry."

"I gathered from the audible guilt," Derrick sighed and I asked amusedly, "So are you still going to kill me?"

"I suppose not."

I breathed a very loud sigh of relief as we went up a staircase at the end of the hallway, "I love you, Derrick. In a platonic way. So does Rian. And Cat, when I tell her."

"Can I ask you something before we hang up?"

We moved along the second-floor hallway which, was, thankfully, lit because of the open blinds. In unspoken assent we moved back in the direction of the auditorium. Konan took the lead this time; Rian having dropped back to better hear our conversation.

"Sure."

Derrick sounded slightly startled, "Hi, Rian. Am I on speaker?"

"Hi David. Yes you are. And what's your question?"

"Well," Derrick sounded slightly reluctant, "Why did you ask if I was a sociopathic murderer lurking in a dark hallway with an axe?"

This time it was my turn to laugh. Rian just shook her head, took the phone from me, and began to explain.

* * *

_**Three hours later, backstage, Cat's POV**_

"DUDE! CAT! YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED WHILE YOU WERE REHEARSING!!"

I winced and glared at my (at the moment) incredibly loud and obnoxious best friend, "Do you have to be so loud? I already have Jessie shrieking in my ear during the "Defying Gravity" scene and your dulcet tones aren't much better."

Aya's mouth opened in shock and she beamed at Rian, "Dulcet! She called my voice dulcet! Didja hear that?"

Rian rolled her eyes as she waved at Pein, who was lurking in a corner, "Yeah. And you sound like Rudolph."

"The stop-animation one?"

"Yeah. Now go bother Pein for a while. Fill him in."

Aya whined and I pinched the bridge of my nose, "But I don't wanna--OW! God, what _is it_ with you and flip flops today, woman?"

"You sound like Hidan," Rian grinned evilly.

That shut her up until we got back out to the car. Rian told Sasori and Pein what had happened, while she began to fall asleep in the backseat. I was sitting shotgun, Rian was driving, and Konan and Pein were in the middle seats, while Sasori had sat in the back with Aya.

We stopped at a gas station nearby the house, and I gently shook Aya awake, saying, "Come on. We're stopping at a gas station. Get yourself something to eat; we're gonna watch a movie when we get home."

She straightened up so fast she nearly got vertigo, "Which one? Which one?"

"Guess."

"The Chipmunks?"

I looked horrified, "God, no. Think again."

"Some horrible sex chick movie that you wanna see?"

I just stared, "What happened to your mind? No. Be serious this time."

"Avatar?"

I shook my head, "9. You haven't seen it ye--Ooomph!" Aya had glomphed me enthusiastically, "Nine! Yes! I mean, Avatar was amazing, don't get me wrong, but NINE!!! I wanna see it! Wheee! I'll be right back I'm getting a snack!"

"Oh. . .kay. . ." I exchanged a look with Pein, who shrugged and exited the car. Getting out myself, I heard a crash as I entered the store and saw Rian and Aya trying to put a milkshake machine back on the counter where it was placed. I studiously ignored them and moved towards the candy section, humming quietly to myself as I went along. _Hmmm. . .Twix or Dove today?_

"Sssst. Cat. Help here!"

Lalalalalala. I'm not listening. Lalalala. . .

"CAT!"

Making my purchases, I smirked at my best friends, took a picture with my phone of them and the retarded machine, and headed back to the car.

_**Five minutes later, Cat's POV**_

"This is all your fault."

"My fault?" Aya's voice was incredulous and I smiled into my book, _Looking for Alaska_, "How is it my fault? I can't help it if you don't know how to work a milkshake machine. Hey, I made an alliteration."

"I think it's supposed to be made up of more than two words, hon. And yeah, it's your fault. You're the one that put the mixer on the highest setting when the warning that the staff put up expressly said not to," Rian began to back up the car and I buckled my seatbelt in as she continued, "But then, 'Oh, no, it's not going to be nearly as good if you just stick it on regular, Rian, it'll be all syrupy--"

"Well," Aya returned grumpily, "It would've been. Have you ever used that thing before? No. And I wasn't the one who jumped and shrieked when the thing nearly sent ice cream everywhere and nearly knocked everything over anyway. Get off the curb, Rian."

"Quit backseat driving," Rian smirked into the rearview mirror and Aya laughed, "I'm not the one on that's driving on the curb. And there's a speed trap ahead. Pay attention."

"It's your curse," our driver said darkly, "Whenever anyone talks to you when driving, something happens. Or we break a driving law. It's all your fault."

"What do you think, Catherine-san?"

I shot an alarmed look towards the back in general, "Sasori, why are you asking me? Do you see me trying to avoid this conflict taking place right in front of me? I like living. It's a comfortable--"

"--state of being," Aya reached forward tapped my nose, "You stole my line. Not fair."

I wrinkled my nose at her, "Who said you came up with that line? Do you have a patent on it? Hush."

Aya just retorted with a yawn and reclined back against the headrest, "Good idea. I think I'll sleep now."

I cocked my head to the side, "You are scatterbrained."

"I'm easily distracted. Now let me sleep."

"I would," Rian said gleefully and I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye, "But it would be kind of pointless, since we're home. Get out, slug."

"Just for that, Rian, I'm going to butcher another song--"

The victim looked horrified as we exited the vehicle, with good reason. Aya chose, "Called, 'Party in the US of A' by that horrendous child--even though she's our age--Miley Cyrus. I put my hands up they're playing my song, the butterflys fly awaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy--OW! Cut it OUT! What have I said about the damn flip flops?!"

"You have deserved it each and every time I've done it to you."

"Why don't you use your real voice, Aya?"

Aya just gaped at me, shocked, as I pulled her unresisting towards the house, "C'mon, you have a real sweet voice."

"No. Way."

"Why not?" I gave her my best innocent expression and she snorted, "You and Rian are _you_. They're _them_. I'd rather drop dead. Maybe Konan. Or Tobi. But that's it. Ever. And I'm not anywhere _near _as good as you are."

I shrugged, "You also haven't been singing for over ten years, silly. I'm holding you to that. C'mon, let's get the movie rea--what did they _do_?"

My eyes widened as I stared in shock at the house's interior.

Everything was. . .

was. . .

Different.

Seriously. Different colors, different furniture, different--

And then it changed again back to normal and Deidara popped out from behind one of the chairs, saying cheerfully, "Sorry, ladies. I was working on a genjutsu in case we ever got bored with the house."

I just blinked at him. Aya beamed, "Thanks! But," she asked hesitantly, "You can change it back to normal if you use the genjutsu again, right? I don't want to have to explain to the owners just why--"

Tobi waved his hands frantically from behind the TV, "No, no, we can change it back. Aya-chan and Rian-chan and Cat-chan don't need to worry!"

I sighed with relief as the the other shinobi appeared in the room, "Thank God. Well, we're watching a movie tonight; you guys are welcome to watch. We picked 9. Did you guys eat?"

"Yeah."

"Duh."

"Of course, Catherine-chan!"

"No shit, sherlock."

"Yes, Catherine-san."

_**"I want to eat someone."**_

_"No you don't. Stop it."_

"The reason why she's asking, smart ones," Rian's voice was ever-so-slightly cutting, "Was because we ate on the way home. Well, come on, Aya, let's get the movie started."

Getting the popcorn bag out of the pantry, I opened it from its packaging and stuck it in the microwave and motioned Aya to come in the kitchen. Once she complied, I turned the oven fan on and explained to Aya, "I don't want the ninjas to eavesdrop."

Aya looked quizzically at me, "What's up? Is there something I need to know about? Are you pregnant? Did you kill someone?"

"Yes, I need to ask you a question. No, there isn't anything to know about. Yes, the child is yours. And no, I haven't killed anyone."

Rian choked from where she stood in the doorway, "God forbid you two have children. Alright, what're you putting Aya on the hot seat for?"

I laughed, "Don't worry, it's not really bad. Aya, do you--" I mouthed the rest of the sentence 'like Hidan?' silently.

Both my best friends raised their eyebrows and Aya replied carefully, "Are you sure this is the time to talk about it?"

"If you want to get through the movie with us running interference, yes."

She rubbed her eyebrows and nodded her head, "Sorta. Like, you guys know I meant what I said earlier," We nodded understanding to her reference of his being pretty, "But dude. He's such a pain in the ass sometimes. No joke. And I don't know him. And he's a ninja. And he's a masoschist. I don't want to wake up one morning and realize I'm part of one of his rituals. And what would happen if I pissed him off enough and he forgot that I wasn't a ninja? Not to mention," she sighed and her shoulders drooped slightly, although she hid her feelings from her face, "I doubt he's like that with me anyway. I mean, I'm not a ninja. I'm not a whore. I'm not anywhere near skilled enough in anything for him to take interest in. Further, he's going to go home; there's no guarantee that he'd be able to come back, much less want to. In fact, he and the others probably won't once they realize how soft they've gotten here."

The microwave beeped and I jumped, swearing. Rian moved farther inside the kitchen and gingerly pulled out the bag. Setting it aside, she grabbed a bowl from one of the cabinets and carefully opened the bag over the bowl, dumping the contents inside.

I leaned back against the counter, replying aloud thoughtfully, "You have a bunch of good points. You've been thinking about this for a while, haven't you? You've been more quiet than usual, for you."

"Gee, thanks," Aya returned wryly, "Yes, I have. I mean, when you look at the fanfics that other authors have written about this happening, and we're right in the middle of it-" she sighed wearily, "-I don't even know what to do. Things like this aren't even supposed to be real."

"I know," Rian said quietly, "And it's a pain. But shouldn't we enjoy it while they're here? As long as we keep the thought of their inevitable going home in mind, that should help us with how attached we are to them, right?"

"God," I said just as quietly, "What're we gonna do when they're gone?"

"Live like we used to, te'sorthene," Aya's use of 'spirit-friend' seemed appropriate here, "And move on. And yeah, I'll miss them. But enough of that," Aya perked herself back up and said cheerfully, "We'd better go make sure they didn't blow up anything so we'll be able to watch the movie I haven't seen before."

She exited the room, whistling horribly, with Rian behind her holding the bowl of popcorn, and me behind them.

But while everyone else was watching the movie, our recent conversation kept me thoughtful until I fell asleep in my room.

* * *

**_I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter!_**

**_I thought that some character information was due. Cat's and Rian's will be coming soon, too. Please review!_**

**_And the term 'te'sorthene' does actually mean 'heart friend' or 'spirit friend'. It's Shin'a'in. Anyone who's read any Mercedes Lackey book besides the Arrows Trilogy in the Valdemar world knows what I'm talking about. For the deprived, Shin'a'in is a country and language in that world by the above author._**

**_Again, constructive criticism please, and thanks for reading!_**

**_Regards,_**

**_Ice  
_**


	12. 9 and Bugs

**Title:** This Just Isn't My Day/Chapter Eleven

**By:** Ice-Eagle Y'Siri

**Disclaimer:** Don't own Naruto or the Akatuski or anything associated with Naruto. Or the song that I borrowed four lines from, "Free to Be Me" by Francesca Battistelli.

**Summary:** Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the heck out of the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

**_THIS IS A FILLER CHAPTER. I'M USING IT TO INSPIRE ME TO CONTINUE THE STORY LINE TO SOMEWHERE._**

**I, well, wow. It's been over a year. **

**Um.**

**I'm not gonna apologize. I'm a senior in high school and working on applying for scholarships to pay for tuition for the University I'm going to. The majority of my classes are AP and honors, I'm involved in four different clubs, I'm working on trying to find a job or somewhere to volunteer, and I honestly barely had any time to breathe since school had started for me in August. So I don't know how often I'm going to be updating. It's been hard to get the inspiration for it when most of the Akatsuki (or is it all of them now?) are dead according to canon. But, I hope you enjoy the story to its end (not that it's going to anytime soon!). And as I update I'll also work on redoing previous chapters. The ones from the very beginning could stand some renovating and retouching.**

**So, enjoy and don't forget to review!**

_Whispering_

Speaking

**

* * *

**

**_Aya's POV_**

The first thing I noticed during the movie is that Hidan sucks at being sneaky.

Which you'd think, since he's a ninja, he'd be a master at that sort of thing. But no. Like his personality, Hidan absolutely fails at being subtle. How do I know this?

Well, first off, we were forced to share the Lay-Z-Boy to the left of the sofa, with Rian, Cat, Tobi, Konan, and Deidara in a mash-up of limbs and pillows currently sharing said object (and by the visible dip in the middle, that poor piece of furniture was never going to be the same again). Kakuzu and Sasori were perched on opposite ends of the window seat (Sasori closer to me, Kakuzu at the far end) while Zetsu and Pein were sat on chairs they brought in from the kitchen. Itachi and Kisame were watching from the ceiling.

I had protested vigorously to sitting next to Hidan, but Rian was already glomped by Tobi as she had come out of the kitchen and Catherine had fallen over the back of the sofa in her unsuccessful attempt at getting him to let go, and the rest of the group just piled on from there.

There was also the floor, but I didn't trust Kakuzu's rope-things. Or Zetsu's vines. Therefore, I had to sit on the La-Z-Boy. With Hidan.

Who wouldn't quit trying to cuddle me by wrapping his arm around my shoulders and trying to shift me on top of him.

If there was an awkward button, I would've jumped on it multiple times by now.

"_Bitch, please, you know you like it. Just let me hug you already_," Hidan hissed in my ear and I was thankful for the darkness (and long-sleeved shirt) that hid the goosebumps spreading on my arms, "_I'd be able to spread out and you'd be on top like you wanted._"

There were so many things wrong with that sentence I didn't know where to start, "_Hidan, shut up, I'm trying to watch._"

"_I'm more interesting_," he whispered and I quietly snorted, "_Are not. I haven't seen this movie before. Cut it out._"

"_Won't you just f-ing move already?_"

"_No!_"

"_Why the hell not? I mean, for Jashin's sake-_"

"_-You're making me uncomfortable!_" I shifted uneasily next to him, "Now quit it."

"Quit flirting back there, you two. And Hidan, quit trying to molest her. Did you forget her age that quickly?" Pein's monotone voice cut through our argument, "And Aya, stop unintentionally using your feminine wiles on him. He's pathetically susceptible."

I blinked. Then blinked again.

From the slightly taken aback look on Hidan's face, he was as surprised as me.

I sighed, "I don't have feminine wiles. I have no clue how to flirt."

Hidan opened his mouth and I bopped him upside the head, "Shut up. I want to watch the movie."

For once, he listened to me and closed his mouth, but not before giving me a considering look. I shrugged and keep my eyes steadfastly fixed on the screen in front of me. Rian and Catherine had ignored the scene and were absorbed in the movie as well, and I didn't give any more thought to what had happened.

**_Two hours later_**

I yawned as the credits began to roll, then climbed out of the La-Z-Boy, stretching out the kinks in my neck in the process. I ignored my seatmate's complaining for the moment and stood, "Aw, c'mon Aya, get back here! We were just getting comfy," Hidan patted the spot next to him with a smirk and I rolled my eyes, "Let me think about that. . .no."

"What the hell? You're so cold!" Hidan's eyes grew dark, "Maybe that's why I like you so much."

I smiled as I followed Rian and Cat toward the stairs, "Thanks so much for the compliment. Better than being the opposite. I could've turned out like you."

"Killer zinger, un," Deidara's voice echoed a little as we made our way into our rooms to change in our pj's.

"YOU DON'T MEAN THAT," Hidan's voice sounded through my door. I opened it and poked my head out, staring incredulously at Rian, "Did he really scream that from downstairs?"

"You know it."

"Well, damn-ow! Cat, what the heck was that for when you're the one that swears like a sailor-ow!" I frowned as she laughed, then hollered back to the silver-haired idiot downstairs, "YES I DO!"

"NO YOU DON'T!"

"YES I DO!'

"NO!"

"YES!"

"DAMMIT, QUIT SCREAMING!"

"YOU FIRST!"

"God, how old are you two? Five?" Cat looked at Rian for confirmation and she shrugged, "They really were made for each other-OW!"

"NO, YOU!"

"YOU!"

"YOU!"

"LOVEBIRDS, SHUT UP AND GO TO BED!"

Silence.

I just gaped at Rian, who started backing into her room, "Heh. Heh. I was kidding. Did I mention that? It was a joke. Yeah. Pretty funny, riiiiiii-GAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

Rian slammed her door as I began to step into the hallway and Cat just chortled, "Oh, my God, you two, grow up. I want to go to sleep already."

I pointed a finger in her direction, "You, miss, are clearly not an evening person."

Best Friend Number 1 just rolled her eyes, "I already knew that. And so did you. You going to sleep?"

I shook my head, "Not yet. I wanna head out on the deck. I'll stay off the beach, don't worry."

"Got some stuff to think about?" Cat said sympathetically and I sighed, "Not really, more like figuring out what to do with the preps next door."

"Don't you think we've done enough?" she fiddled with the door handle as she spoke, "I mean, they have Rottweilers now. They have to know that it's us messing with them every year."

"Nobody said that they had to come back," I pointed out reasonably, "They could've just bought out some other house and sold the one next to us."

"I guess. . ."

I sighed, "I'm only thinking about it. Maybe we're not gonna pull a prank on them this year. We have enough to worry about with everyone here."

"Point. Well, goodnight. Call me if you need an intervention."

I waved as I moved down the hallway, "Yeah, gotcha. Goodnight."

As I moved back down the hall and started toward the stairs, I paused as Deidara, Sasori, and Itachi moved past me toward their rooms. Deidara just raised an eyebrow and said, "I wouldn't go down there if I were you, un. Hidan's got a bet going that he can jump you as soon as you come down the stairs."

I shrugged, "Well, I'm planning on going out to the deck. I'm sure if I scream loud enough Tobi will protect me."

He just sighed, "If you say so. I could blow him up if you want."

I blinked, "Don't you remember? He's an immortal. His God-"

Deidara waved his hand dismissively, "-God aside, anyone will die if their head is blown up."

I began to edge down the stairs, "Well, thanks for the offer, but I think I'll have to pass it up for now," I had reached the bottom of the staircase and hollered back up (smirking at the Jashinist all the while), "But if he pisses me off enough, I'll let you know if Hidan needs something explosive for breakfast."

"Jashin, you're so f-ing violent," I rolled my eyes as I stepped outside, "Thanks so much. Bye."

"Bye? Where the hell are you going?" I shrugged as I grabbed a flashlight from the top of the fridge, "Outside. On the deck."

"Didn't you forget?"

I paused with my hand on the knob, "Forget what?"

Hidan smirked and I started to glare, "The bugs. They come out on your deck at night since we're so close to the beach."

I just blinked. That was all? "Dude, that's why I wear sneakers when I go out at night," but as an afterthought, I went back to the drawer underneath the dish rack by the sink and grabbed a bottle of bug repellent, "So, laters."

I ignored his holler of, "But I thought you hated bugs!" as the door slammed shut and grinned. I turned on my flashlight and scared off the nocturnal insects with the light, moving toward the railing as I went. Once I reached it, I put the flashlight on top of it and sprayed myself liberally with bug spray. Although I'd have to shower once I got back inside, it was much, much better than getting eaten alive. I had only made that mistake once.

It took me weeks to recover from all the bites. Cortizone and Lanacane were my bestest friends until I got better.

Once that was done, I moved both the flashlight and bug spray over and sat in a nearby chair, legs perched on top of the railing. As my eyes adjusted to the darkness, I began to notice various constellations in the sky, including the Big Dipper and Orion.

"Whatcha starin' at?" my hands twitched; the only indication of my surprise. With a flicker of amusement I noted that I became less and less startled as the ninjas' sneak-ups progressed, "Isn't it obvious, Hidan?"

"The sky? There sure as shit isn't anything interesting up there."

"For the uneducated, maybe," I sighed as I continued to stare into the sky, "You know, it was quiet and peaceful before you barged out here."

I heard a chair scrape up next to mine and turned to see Hidan assume the same pose as me. With a huff, he turned his head to make eye contact, "I don't stare at stars much. There isn't much to see. They just twinkle. They provide light when I travel at night. That's all."

I raised an eyebrow, "Then why are you out here?"

I twitched as I felt a breeze shoot past my calf and I felt slight shudders in the wooden rail below it. My eyes widened as I saw a spider pinned next to my leg, a kunai holding it down, "You really want that crawling on you? Be my guest."

"No, thanks," I said quietly, "So thanks. But maybe I should go back inside."

"You're not f-ing going inside when you just got out here. So stay put. Why look at stars, anyway? If you have to stare at something, stare at the ocean or at _me_, for Jashin's sake."

I laughed, "But we see the ocean every day."

"There's still me."

"You're boring to look at."

"That's a lie," I turned to look at Hidan again, "See, you're staring at me now."

I raised an eyebrow and snorted, "That's because we're having a conversation. Duh."

"Doesn't matter," Hidan sounded triumphant and I rolled my eyes, "You're still staring. Every chance you get you look at me."

I just turned my head back toward the sky and said, "God, arrogant much? Whatever. I'm going back to stargazing. I have a lot to think about."

"Such as?"

I moved my fingers a little and moved them onto the armrests, ignoring the thumps of more bugs being pinned by Hidans' kunai, "Stuff. It's too big for you to understand."

"Try me," Hidan's voice had turned more coaxing, but I could still hear a slight undertone of mockery to it, so I replied, "I'd rather not."

"Why?"

I shrugged and braced myself, "I don't trust you."

There was silence for a time and I savored it for the rare luxury that it was, even though it was bought at insulting Hidan. I could hear the plastic chair squeak a little as Hidan shifted to think, so I took it as a sign that Hidan was seriously considering what I had said.

"Damn," he said finally, "That was cold."

I shrugged again, "You asked. What did you expect me to say?"

"Not that."

It was my turn to be shocked, "Why?"

I sighed as Hidan parroted back at me, "It's too big for you understand."

"Whatever."

"Whatever?"

I smiled a little, "Yeah, whatever."

"That's it?"

"Yeah."

"Seriously, that's it?"

"Yeah."

"Really?"

"Yes, Hidan. Can we drop it now?"

"Drop what?"

I groaned, "Oh, my God."

"You see, this is what I put up with every day. It's a good thing he's an immortal or I would've killed him by now."

A shadow dropped onto the wooden rail to my left and I saw jade eyes as Hidan responded, "Kakuzu-teme, go away, dammit. I was actually getting somewhere for a change."

"Is that why you guys are partners?" I asked, intrigued and Kakuzu's eyes crinkled very slightly, "Yes, that's why we're partners, Aya-san. I'm not going away, moron, because me and Aya-san are having a conversation."

"So it's okay for you to barge into our alone time-ow! Aya, dammit-ow!-and I can't make you go away?"

I just sighed at the violet-eyed ninja, "You are such an idiot."

"That's why you love me."

Kakuzu and I snorted simultaneously, "Hah. You wish."

Hidan pointed at me and said triumphantly, "HAH! You do love me!"

"Like I love the plague," I muttered, "So what is it, Kakuzu? I thought you went to sleep already. . .?"

"Lies."

"I came," Kakuzu broke in patronizingly, "To get the bastard next to you. I want to go to sleep. If I don't take him with me now, he'll barge in later and break half the things in the room and wake me up and then we'll fight and take out the block and then you and the other two will probably die in the crossfire."

I blinked and Hidan said grumpily, "Jashin-be-damned, Kakuzu, don't exaggerate. We'd only destroy about half of it."

"Like that's so much better!" I sputtered and Hidan laughed, "It is so easy to rile you up."

"Whatever. Go to bed," I huffed, "I don't want to die during the night. Good night." I stood, pushing my chair back.

"Good night, Aya-san. I will meet you both inside, Kakuzu leapt across the deck and slid through the door before I could blink, "Dang, I wish I could move like that. I'm jealous."

" 'Cept you don't have chakra coils so you're kind of screwed."

I rolled my eyes, "Gee, thanks. Can't let a girl dream. Good night, Hidan."

"I don't get a hug?"

I turned with a sigh and walked into his arms, "Fine. Jeez. Touchy-feely much?"

"Just like hugging you, that's all. Keeps my urges-"

I broke away and backed toward the door, "-and we're done. Good night Hidan. And bring the other stuff I had with me in, too."

"I'm not your maid!"

"I'll complain to Kakuzu in the morning that you were being a jerk."

"He wouldn't care," I opened the door and called back, "But Pein would. You want me to tell him instead?"

"Dammit!"

" 'Night, Hidan," And with that I shut the door.

* * *

**So yeah. This was a filler sort of thing to further characterize Aya and Hidan some. I know that you guys have reviewed me about the other characters and I promise that I will add chapters about them (POVs, as well) as soon as possible. But since I'm just getting back into the swing of things, please be lenient. And if you have storyline suggestions, please let me know through a review or a message.**

**Thanks again for reading, and please review!**

**Regards,**

**Ice-Eagle  
**


	13. Interlude 1: Rian's POV

**Title:** This Just Isn't My Day/Chapter Thirteen

**By:** Ice-Eagle Y'Siri

**Disclaimer:** Don't own Naruto or the Akatuski or anything associated with Naruto.

**Summary:** Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the heck out of the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

**This is just an interlude, so don't get too excited. Another chapter will be out soon, but I wanted to give you guys something before the New Year and I just squeaked by, too!**

**Hello, all! Been a while...**

**And really, all of you guys, thanks for your patience, seriously, because I honestly never expected this story to reach 50 reviews, much less a hundred. I know a lot of authors publish their stuff online without being reviewed by anyone, so what I'm trying to say is that I'm really grateful.**

**But to be really honest, I haven't felt much inspiration for any of my stories *gasp*. Originally, this story was just something for me to write and my best friends to giggle over because I had the temerity that all new fanfic writers did, which was to self-insert as OCs.**

**Then I started slacking and not writing every day, so then of course I lost inspiration for everything I was writing.**

**Also, writing on a laptop is a bitch. I like desktop keyboards better.**

**And you can tell that I haven't written in a while because my grammar (and spelling) is all shot to hell, so please excuse me. I know I said I would renovate my first few chapters, but I look at them now and wince. Once I get over that reaction I'll get them fixed. Promise.**

**I'm also wondering if I should age my characters some. Because I've been talking to a bunch of fabulous writers throughout FF, and it's one thing if your characters are of legal age (I'm thinking at least 19-20s). It's another if they're 17. That's a little creepy (in my opinion). So now I'm wondering if I should change things up a little when I go back through my first four or five chapters. The age difference thing between Aya and Hidan (and other ninjas with Cat/Rian) would still be there because they're still decades older than the three of them. Thoughts?**

**Thanks agan (and PM me any suggestions) and don't forget to review!**

* * *

**_Rian's POV_**

_Beepbeepbeepbeepbee*crash*_

_Oh, my God_, I thought, _Why is Cat's alarm going off at stupid o'clock in the morning? Make it stop._

"Well, it wasn't my idea," Kakuzu's voice echoed through my room and I yelped, sitting up in shock.

"Yes, you were speaking aloud."

I winced.

"Oh. Uh. Sorry?"

I glanced over and saw the shinobi leaning against the doorway, arms crossed. He raised an eyebrow, "You weren't the one that woke me up. Although you'll want to watch that habit of yours."

I winced again and peered around his body, but couldn't see any movement in the hallway-it was still dark. I looked at my clock and sighed at the 5:00 that lit up my room in a soft green glow. _Cat, why must you practice your singing so effing early?_ Rubbing my face, I jumped a little when I looked back up and saw Kakuzu with one foot in my room, the other still in the doorway.

He tilted his head to the side, "May I come in?"

I shrugged, "I can't exactly stop you, now can I?"

"No need to be cynical. Besides, it's polite," the Akatsuki member still hadn't moved from his position. "May I come in?"

"Sure. There's not much to see. Leave the door cracked, though."

I turned on the lamp next to my bed and grabbed the sweatshirt laying on the headboard behind me. I pulled it on while his back was turned. I wore only Soffes and a tanktop to bed, so I felt a little awkward. It wasn't that I was really even that exposed-the day we spent at the beach took care of that-but it was him and I being in my room alone. With so many people living here now, that hadn't exactly happened much. Cat always had her door open talking with someone and Aya was constantly kicking Hidan out of her room. Either one of them (Cat or Aya, that is) seemed to be escaping to my bedroom several times a day to be by themselves or for the three of us to be together. Not to mention I found Kakuzu somewhat attractive.

Thus explaining my slight discomfort.

I yawned as I watched said ninja make a slow circuit of my room, pause at a few items of interest, and sit on my desk chair. I moved out from under the covers, sitting cross-legged on top of them.

"Is this the part where you intimidate me by telling me just what you've learned about me in my room? Because honestly, that would freak me out. Also, that's a little too Sherlock Holmes-ey for my taste."

Kakuzu blinked at me, "No."

I was a little lost, "Soooo...what brings you here at ohmygodo'clock in the morning?"

The ninja shrugged.

I eyed him warily, "So if I went back to bed, you wouldn't pull an Edward and watch me sleep, would you? Because I would definitely have to talk to Konan about that."

He snorted and I put my arms up in surrender, "Well, 'scuse me for asking, shit."

"Swearing is vulgar."

This time I snorted, "Well, considering who you have for a partner, I thought you would have gotten used to it by now. Haven't you guys been working together for years?"

"We all have little things that we find extremely aggravating, Rian-san. Swearing is one of them. Spending money is another," Kakuzu shifted in his seat and I watched the muscles ripple across his body. I found it fascinating to watch ninjas move, because you could tell everything they did conserved their energy to the maximum. Just enough to move, run, change position, and no more. It went beyond body control and discipline to something I knew nobody who wasn't raised to fight since they were young would be able to match.

"You're staring, Rian-san," I looked at Kakuzu's face and saw his cheek twitch.

Narrowing my eyes at him, I accused, "You're laughing at me!"

"There is no sound of amusement coming out of my mouth."

"Inwardly."

"It's impossible to laugh inside of yourself, Rian-san. Stop entertaining such ridiculous notions," the ninja's eyes (which were the perfect shade of green-_oh, my God, stop_) crinkled a little as I huffed.

"Now you're being difficult."

"I always thought that Aya-san was the easier one to rile up."

I rolled my eyes, "No, actually, it would be Cat. She's a drama kid. Hidan seems to have an easier time getting under Aya's skin than most."

"Where does that leave you, then, Rian-san?"

I moved to the end of the bed so I wouldn't have to project my voice from across the room, "Somewhere in the middle, I suppose." Getting up, I rifled through my sock drawer until I found a pair of green fuzzy socks with grips on the bottom and put them on.

"Well, let's go, then. I want breakfast, preferably a donut or something," I said as I went out the door and down the steps, Kakuzu not that far behind me. "I don't feel like gnawing through a bagel."

"I still find what you eat for breakfast odd."

I shook a finger at him as I stepped into the kitchen and switched on my iPod docked into its charger with built in speakers. I turned up the volume just enough to muffle Cat's voice. Not that I particularly minded hearing her sing, cause she was pretty awesome at it, but hearing the same thing every morning got-repetitive, as a tactful way to put it. Aya would be so proud.

"Don't criticize my food and I won't talk about yours."

"You still wouldn't speak negatively about ours anyway 'cause we'd kill you, un," Deidara bounced in from the back porch and took a seat at the bar overlooking the kitchen.

I rolled my eyes and Kakuzu sighed.

"It's the principal of the thing, moron," The stitched ninja and I shot each other knowing looks which turned into a staring contest. I coughed and looked away just in time to see Deidara smirk.

"Shut up, idjit. Did you eat already?" I opened the pantry and found a package of my favorite donuts, then shut the door. I grabbed a plate from the cabinets, then found a glass and poured myself some orange juice.

"Nope."

I leaned against the counter and looked at the bomb specialist, studiously ignoring Kakuzu as I did so, "Are you hungry?"

"No."

"Guess that should have been my first question."

"Somethin' like that, un."

"Smartass."

"Thanks."

"As you can tell, he still is enough of an idiot to not be able to distinguish the difference between an insult and a compliment. Good morning, Rian-san," Itachi ghosted through the kitchen and back out again, calling out over his shoulder, "I will leave my dishes on the counter when I am done. My thanks. Also, the rabbits outside the house are carnivorous. Don't feed them. And the crabs underneath the deck thank you guys for all the extra bugs that were killed last night."

Above us, we could hear a door slam shut.

Deidara, Kakuzu, and I just looked at each other.

"I think he took Monty Python too close to heart, un," Deidara's eyes had widened a little and I choked.

"Either that or he's just _batshit insane_."

"I think it is both, Rian-san," I shuddered at Kakuzu's words and he continued, "At least he is on our side. And relatively harmless."

"I think your definition of 'relatively' and my version of 'relatively' are two wildly different things."

"That I can agree on. Hey, boo," I felt arms wrap around me and I knew it was Aya, so I returned her hug.

I was a little taken aback, "I think this is the earliest I've ever seen you awake."

Aya shrugged, "I wanted to see the sunrise at least once before the summer ended and now seemed like as good a time as any. Plus, Cat woke me up."

I snickered and she smirked. Unlike me, Aya wore thin pj pants to bed and a t-shirt (she used to wear shorts, but that was before the random Bedroom Invasions of Hidan) and this morning had pulled a dark blue hoodie over her head. Most of her warderobe was blue or black or dark colors, something I heard through the convoluted Akatsuki grapevine that Hidan was hell-bent on changing.

Ha. Like he'd be successful. Good luck with that.

Not really.

"I want oatmeal," I frowned a little at Aya as she disappeared into the pantry. Aya only wanted oatmeal when she was cold and considering she was from up North, that was exceedingly rare.

"Did Hidan steal the blankets or something?"

I heard something crash and Aya swore. Sticking her head out, she wrinkled her nose at all of us, "This is assuming we're sleeping in the same bed. No, I went outside this morning and it was a little more brisk than I expected. Don't get all excited."

"Aw, damn."

"Bitch."

"Jerk."

Aya laughed as she reemerged and began to make her breakfast. During our banter, Deidara had wandered back outside and Kakuzu was sipping his tea (we made it clear that we didn't drink anything alcoholic, not to mention it was illegal, so on Pein's orders everybody had fallen back to drinking tea instead) and watching us.

"I believe I will go bounty hunting today, Aya-san, Rian-san. I will not be back until late afternoon. Convey this to Pein-sama."

I mock-saluted, "Yes, sir."

And with that he disappeared out the door (which still had a hole in it) and I jumped onto the counter.

"Dude, we can't even get up at indecent hours anymore just to get breakfast without something happening."

Aya cocked her head over her bowl of oatmeal, waiting for it to cool, "Well, Itachi thinking he can talk to crabs and thinking carnivorous rabbits exist in this world is relatively minor, as far as Things That Happen go."

"Point."

"If you're cold I know just how to warm you up, babe," Aya rolled her eyes and jumped onto the counter beside me, ignoring Hidan as he stepped into the room.

I was a little appalled myself, "That was one of the worst pickup lines I've ever heard, and I've heard quite a few. You need to spar with Kakuzu or something; you're getting soft."

"Shut your trap, dammit."

"I'm right, so stop bitching."

"Jashin will take-"

"-my soul and torture it with pleasure in the afterlife, yadda yadda yadda. You need to come up with some new material, man, cause being intimidated by you is no fun if you keep using the same threats and insults," Since I was sitting next to the sink, I leaned over it and rinsed my dishes, setting them aside for me to deal with later.

"She's right, you know," Konan looked amused as she stepped in from the front door, "Good morning, Rian-chan, Aya-chan."

"Morning."

Hidan just huffed and sulked over his jam-covered bagel. Out of all the Akatsuki, he had adapted to the diet change the best and continued to be amused by every culinary challenge that was placed before him.

"Being intimidated isn't supposed to be f-ing fun, Jashin curse you all."

Aya and I both shrugged, "Well, it's fun for us, cause you can't actually kill us. So ha."

Aya grinned at Hidan's frustrated mutters and said cheerfully, "I think today's another movie day. What do you want to see?"

"As long as it's not those damn chipmunks, I don't give a flying f-."

"I wasn't asking for your opinion anyway," Aya snapped and Hidan smiled a little.

I just sighed. _Here we go again._

"How about you and I go get dressed and talk about this with Cat later? She should be done relatively soon."

And so we did.

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**So yeah. There was a teaser from Rian's point of view. The next chaper (which will be an actual chapter, I promise) will be featuring mostly Cat, then back to Aya. Then over to one of the Akatsuki. You guys can pick. Hidan, Deidara, Kisame, Kakuzu, or someone else entirely. Vote by PM or in review-the top two with the most votes will get written first. :)**

**I hope you guys enjoyed this. I will continue this soon. Spring semester starts this week and I'll get something out within the next two weeks or so. Keep PMing me if I don't have anything by then, because I might forget to post...that's what happened a few times.**

**Thanks again and please review!**

**Ice-Eagle**


	14. Books and Sweet Tea

**Title:** This Just Isn't My Day/Chapter Fourteen

**By:** Ice-Eagle Y'Siri

**Disclaimer:** Don't own Naruto or the Akatuski or anything associated with Naruto.

**Summary:** Normally, I'm a very calm person. So just imagine me coming home with my friends and the Akatsuki in my living room. And all I wanted was a simple vacation annoying the heck out of the preps next door. Great. Just. Great.

**Whoo! Next chapter and it's been a week (or less, depends on when I release this)! Awesome!**

**It's shorter than the last one, but there are also only two characters. The chapters will get longer the more characters are added and the more settled back in I get into the story. So don't worry about that. The next one should be longer and also much more fun.**

**Also, there is an indirect reference to something from _Looking For Alaska_. Anyone who read the book will know what I'm talking about. If you haven't read it, it's written by John Green and one of my favorite novels of all time. Go check it out after you read this.**

**And also, I'm aware that the characters are Japanese and they theoretically wouldn't know any English. However, I'm am bending the rules a little bit for a small part later on in the chapter.**

**Hope you enjoy the chapter. :)**

**Don't forget to review!**

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**_Cat's POV_**

I leaned back against the lawn chair with a sigh. A soft breeze slipped around my legs and gently ruffled my hair. With my sunglasses perched on my nose and spf 80+ sunblock covering my arms, legs, and face, I was successfully protected from the sun's rays. A bottle of ice-cold sweet tea sat next to me on the ground and with _Looking For Alaska_ in my hands, I was looking foward to a quiet afternoon.

"Haven't you read that before, un?"

I should have known.

By now, I really should have.

I glanced up briefly at the shadow that covered my book before looking down at the page I was currently on.

"Yes, I have. It's one of my favorites and I like to read it over again every once in a while," I flipped the page.

"Oh."

I shrugged. When I didn't hear any other noise, my eyes flicked up behind my sunglasses to see where the explosives expert went. My eyebrows went up. Deidara was sitting on the railing next to my feet, idly sculpting a piece of clay. His eyes were narrowed and he looked focused and unlikely to continue talking anytime soon, so I resumed reading.

It was another hour or so before he broke the silence once again, "So where is everyone, un?"

"Sparring somewhere," I said absently, "Aya and Rian wanted to watch so they went along, too. Personally, I think it's a little risky, but Aya knows some medical stuff and you guys know jutsu so they should be okay."

"They'll probably get bored, un, because it's unlikely they'll be able to see us move."

I nodded, "I think that thought occurred to them, because I saw both of them take a couple of books of their own to read just in case. Why aren't you with them? Your turn to babysit?"

I was only a little sarcastic.

I looked up and saw Deidara shrug, "Yeah, un. Plus, my hands have been itching to sculpt."

My face must have looked as alarmed as I felt since he laughed and added, "Promise I won't blow up anything, un. I swear."

"Okay, then. You scared me," I closed the book with my finger inside to hold my place.

"So, what is it you're making?"

Deidara shrugged, "Nothing big, un."

His hands were flying around the clay, twisting and pulling it in new directions as he spoke. They were fluttering about the clay so fast that I couldn't get a clear glimpse at what it was he was sculpting. As I continued to watch, I felt myself begin to relax. One thing that all three of us (Aya, Rian, and I) loved to do was go to market days and artist's fairs. There was always at least one whittler or sculpter or carver working on something and we would crowd his/her booth while they were working just to watch. There was something magical to see something be made out of a bit of wood or a coil of wire (or a lump of clay, as Deidara was doing). It's gotten to the point that we each had a small collection of little trinkets that artists had made because they admired our patience and either gave to us for free or for a discounted price.

"I'd have to try this as some kind of hypnosis jutsu, un, if there was a chance that everyone would react as you did," I blinked and shook myself. Deidara had stopped playing with the clay and was smiling at me.

I could feel myself blush and inwardly swore, "Oh. Sorry. I'll just go back to reading now."

I flipped back to the page I was on and steadfastly ignored Deidara's stare, making myself read word after word, sentence after sentence. There was a pause, then I could hear Deidara continue where he had left off and there was silence between the two of us once again.

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_**Deidara's POV**_

Contrary to popular belief, I did enjoy silence and solitude once in a while. If that wasn't possible, I wasn't above sharing that quiet with other-tolerable-people instead. I did value my explosions, but it was the silence afterward that I most revered; I could savor the impact my work had made on the world: the shocked silence and the _emptiness_ that took just a little longer than normal to fill, as if even the air itself was in awe at what I had done.

So I was aware that everyone else had left this morning, but since my main techniques involved my explosion art, I was told to stay back and keep an eye on Catherine-chan. When I had asked Cat that question of where everybody had disappeared, I was gauging her response to see whether or not she wanted to talk. It was rare that the two of us were alone, so I was determined to enjoy it.

And then when she blushed-I smirked inwardly. _So that's where the wind blows, hmmm?_

Not that I was complaining. The opposite, actually.

My eyes flicked down to the clay in my hands. I was so skilled in molding clay that if my mind wandered somewhere else, my hands would continue their work uninterrupted and (usually) produce a flawless piece. In this instance, it was a swan, wings outstretched, beak extended.

I held out my work to her, "What do you think? Not too bad, yeah?"

Cat looked up and her eyes widened. She glanced at the page she was on, then back up at the swan in my hands, then back down at the page. I tilted my head to the side, confused.

"What is it, un?"

She just shook her head, "Nothing. It's lovely, Deidara."

I narrowed my eyes at her but she ignored it and held out her hand, "May I?"

I nodded and she plucked the swan from my hands and cradled it gently between hers. While she was admiring it, I snatched the book from her lap, ignoring her protests for it back. I quickly scanned the page and started laughing.

"That's why you looked so surprised, un."

Cat nodded. She moved the swan to one hand, "Yeah. I thought you had read it upside down while you were working and decided to make a swan."

I shook my head.

"I don't suppose I could have my book back?"

I looked at it, then over to Cat. I handed it to her, "Could I read it when you're done, un? It looks interesting, yeah."

She looked surprised, "If you want. As long as you don't set it on fire by accident. Or on purpose."

By the way she was holding her book and her glance at her watch for the time, I could tell she wanted to get back to reading, so I jumped off the railing and dragged another chair next to her. I was wearing a plain wifebeater and shorts and I had taken off my eye device. I propped my feet up on the railing nearby hers and grabbed another piece of clay from my pouch.

"It's been a while since you've had some peace, Catherine-chan. I'd enjoy it while you can." At her skeptical look, I elaborated. "We don't fight all the time, you know that, Cat-chan. A lot of time it's hiding out and stuff, un."

"Doesn't that get boring?"

I nodded, "You have no idea." I changed the subject. "Now weren't you reading? I'm going to wait for you to get started on that because I don't know if you want to get hypnotized by my sculpting again, yeah. Not that I'd mind," I flirted gently and she ducked her head a little, "But I think you would."

"Good notion."

I sat back in my chair and looked down at the beach, relaxing. That was an interesting first exchange with just the two of us. And as far as my bit of flirting went-seems like it'd be accepted. And reciprocated. I smirked a little. This was gonna be fun.

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**Heya, guys! I'm finally getting back into the groove of things. I really do have to say, it's easier to keep up writing when you're past that first semester of college and you've gotten the hang of things. I hope you guys like the chapter.**

**And Jamie Wilson, I will write Hidan and Itachi next. Just so you know.**

**And those who like this story, I have another set in the same universe called _Numbers and Rainbows: A Series of Drabbles_. They are what they're called and they're all over the place, so feel free to look at that, too. :)**

**As always, if you guys have any suggestions (and that includes plot suggestions, as well) feel free to PM me or leave them in a review. As you could tell, this chapter was more characterization than humor.**

**I wrote Deidara the way I did because I think he's more mellowed out one-on-one. I also wrote him in this way because the Akatsuki are all S-ranked and in order to get there and not be killed, besides having valuable skills, they must be scarily intelligent. I thought I'd try writing him a little from this perspectiive for a change instead of constantly provoking Sasori and the others. I think it turned out fairly well.**

**Of course, thanks for reading, and don't forget to review!**


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